Does Getting Older Mean More Freedoms?

By

Does Getting Older Mean More Freedoms?
At mid-life it's possible to view life from a new perspective.

3. Satisfaction. After many years of being a responsible, hard-working adult and focusing on taking care of others at home, at work and in family relationships, many adults find that they don’t know what they want for themselves. It’s time to learn how to make the decisions that create the enriched, satisfying experience you always hoped your life could be. When you do, you’ll discover what satisfaction means for you, and how to re-focus your life to create more of it.

4. Enjoyment. Your ability to take pleasure in life, to “lighten up”, to find the fun in a simple moment, may have been suppressed over the years. You may just need a slight attitude shift to become more light-hearted or it may require major decisions to simplify and re-focus your goals. You can learn how to make the decisions that free you up to have more fun.

Smart Decisions For People Over Forty
If you stop to think about it, you know the difference between those who make smart, considered choices, and those who seem to let life push them around. You probably know people who succeed despite difficulties and bad breaks, and people who seem to have everything handed to them, but still can’t get it together. You know people whose lives seem full of satisfaction and accomplishment, and others who don’t feel that they have achieved anything worthwhile, so their lives are full of regret and complaints.

Cooperating and being congenial with the people you care about makes your relationships run more smoothly (at least on the surface). However, when you relinquish your power to decide for yourself, your self-esteem suffers, and you feel out of control and unimportant, even in your own life.

As you reflect on the people you know, can you see the difference between those who know how to make good decisions, and those who aren’t sure what to do? None of us is completely confident with every choice we make in life, but those who understand that their decisions will create their outcome and choose accordingly feel more secure more of the time.

As a mature adult, you are approaching the time of greater freedom and greater responsibility toward yourself. Because you’ve lived long enough to master the basic skills of life, you may be wondering what else there is. For many in mid-life, going through days focused on material things and daily chores no longer seems to be sufficient. At this point, people begin to search for a different kind of meaning. “What is my life about?” they ask. “I have most everything I want. Why doesn’t it feel like enough?”

In my therapy practice, these are the questions mature adults ask, and the forces behind the changes they must make. Understanding the important issues of this phase of your life, and being prepared to re-evaluate your goals, find meaning, and make new choices are the tasks you face now. How you meet these challenges will make the difference in how satisfying and rewarding the rest of your life will be. From experience, you know you cannot control everything that happens to you. But you can control the your reaction and response to the events around you. If you can think clearly despite changes, surprises and unplanned circumstances, you will make good choices, and succeed in all the ways you want to.

This article was originally published at Tina B. Tessina. Reprinted with permission.
Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Dr. Tina Tessina

Author

Tina B. Tessina, Ph.D.
http://www.tinatessina.com
tina@tinatessina.com
562-438-8077
Dr. Romance Blog: http://drromance.typepad.com/dr_romance_blog/
http://www.twitter.com/tinatessina
http://www.facebook.com/#!/DrRomanceBlog
Amazon author page http://amzn.to/rar7RC
 

Location: Long Beach, CA
Credentials: LMFT, MFT, PhD
Other Articles/News by Dr. Tina Tessina:

Dr. Romance on Love Styles

By

Dr. Romance writes: There was a time when life seemed very hard, so hard I tried not to think about it.. Several times I helped to destroy some very viable relationships. Changing myself, my life and my loves has been very exciting and fulfilling, yet I am still growing. Love Styles is intended to help you reach your desired destination on your own journey ... Read more

Kindness and Happiness

By

Recently, I went through very unpleasant and difficult dental work, and the outpouring of kindness I received—from my husband, who held onto my ankle all through the two and a half hours (and had nightmares that night about it) to my dear friends, who offered me support and encouragement to heal and take care of myself—made me feel blessed, despite ... Read more

Dear Dr. Romance: I guess we don't separate the "math" from the "

By

To view the video, click here. Dear Dr. Romance: I saw your video  about couples fighting over finances I am totally on board as I think what you share is phenomenal. The challenge is my approach I suppose as my wife Mel is almost NEVER on board. I guess we don't separate the "math" from the "emotion!" Trust me we're ... Read more

See More

PARTNER POSTS
Latest Expert Videos
ASK YOURTANGO MORE QUESTIONS
Most Popular