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Dr. Romance Video: Is there a right way to ask for more sex?

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Dr. Romance Video: Is there a right way to ask for more sex?
Having a time to talk about sex will help you create trust and sexual openness.

Click here to Watch Video:

Dr. Romance's Guidelines for Creating a Sexual Agreement:

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* Set up a problem-solving session:

* Having a time to talk about sex will help you create trust and sexual openness which makes finding solutions much easier.

* Begin with reassurance and good will, reminding each other of your love and of your desire that your sexual relationship be fulfilling for both of you.

* Remember, underneath your anxiety, frustration and struggle, each of you is longing for the other to care about what you want, and to understand you.

* If you have difficulty talking to each other about this, read these guidelines aloud and follow them step-by-step. This is a prime opportunity to improve all the communication in your relationship and get you out of being stuck.

* Remind each other, "I love you, I want our relationship to be good for both of us."

*Share your wants, needs, and ideas: Be honest about your sexual needs. Your partner may feel more like you do about sex than you think; but you'll never know that unless you're willing to express your own feelings and listen to him or her.

More from YourTango: Dear Dr. Romance: What Should A Twentysomething Grad Student Do?

*Being honest means not only telling the truth; but also being willing to hear the truth from each other. Making honesty OK is the key to achieving sexual understanding. The only attitude that works is this one: "I may not like what you tell me, I may have trouble hearing it, but I will still love you, and we will work together to come to an agreement that works."

from Money, Sex and Kids: Stop Fighting about the Three Things That Can Ruin Your Marriage

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Article contributed by
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Dr. Tina Tessina

Author

Tina B. Tessina, Ph.D.
http://www.tinatessina.com
tina@tinatessina.com
562-438-8077
Dr. Romance Blog: http://drromance.typepad.com/dr_romance_blog/
http://www.twitter.com/tinatessina
http://www.facebook.com/#!/DrRomanceBlog
Amazon author page http://amzn.to/rar7RC
 

Location: Long Beach, CA
Credentials: LMFT, MFT, PhD
Other Articles/News by Dr. Tina Tessina:

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