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Dr. Romance Happiness Tip: Give Yourself a Gift

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Dr. Romance Happiness Tip: Give Yourself a Gift
Want to give yourself a holiday gift that'll last a lifetime? Give yourself the gift of happiness.

Dr. Romance writes:

 

More from YourTango: Dear Dr. Romance: why are men in their mid 40s-50s attracted to 2

Want to give yourself a holiday gift that will last the rest of your life? Try giving yourself the gift of happiness.

Research shows that happiness and satisfaction depend more on the inner person than on external circumstances. The secret to living a happy life is to get in charge of your life and what you are doing. Then you can build the life you want.

 

As children, we are strongly influenced by the opinions of others, and what you learn in early childhood can run your life until you understand it and take control of your own ideas and decisions. What is it that you have always wanted to do? Have you been telling yourself you can’t, or that you don’t deserve it? What would happen if you decided to give yourself what you’ve always wanted? Look at your own life and your decisions from a different and valuable perspective. The decisions you make today affect the rest of your life, and you are ultimately the only person to whom you are accountable and for whom you are responsible. Every new decision is truly a new life's resolution. According to recent brain studies, the brain chemical oxytocin is released when there's positive contact with others (or even with oneself) and serotonin, which has a more physical connection.

To increase your happiness, serotonin levels can be raised by:

* physical activity (try ballroom dancing, yoga, belly dancing, swinging on a swing),

* meditation (in an aromatherapy bath, with scented candles or oils, sitting in a lovely outdoor setting, or with special music)

 

You can also raise oxytocin levels with

* comforting touch (a massage, a cuddle session with pets, kids, spouse or even just wrapping up in a snug, furry blanket, or rubbing your skin with silk or scented lotion)

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* loving interaction (a warm exchange with a close friend, family member or child, writing a love letter, working together on a family project, snuggling while watching video or laughing together)

Research  shows that the happiest and healthiest people are those who are well connected to friends and family.

 

"The supreme happiness of life is the conviction that we are loved", wrote Victor Hugo. He knew there are more kinds of love than romance and marriage.

No matter what is happening in your romantic life, the solid presence of good friends and family can lift your spirits, fill your days, and give you the support you need for your romantic relationship. Not only does it take a "village" (community) to raise a child, but in our mobile and fast paced society, a sense of community, family and connectedness helps us to function more effectively as adults in all phases of life.

 

According to current studies, people who have a healthy family and social life are happier and more long lived. By creating family feelings in several areas of your life, you'll have the joy of the give and take of friendship, anytime you want.

Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Dr. Tina Tessina

Author

Tina B. Tessina, Ph.D.
http://www.tinatessina.com
tina@tinatessina.com
562-438-8077
Dr. Romance Blog: http://drromance.typepad.com/dr_romance_blog/
http://www.twitter.com/tinatessina
http://www.facebook.com/#!/DrRomanceBlog
Amazon author page http://amzn.to/rar7RC
 

Location: Long Beach, CA
Credentials: LMFT, MFT, PhD
Other Articles/News by Dr. Tina Tessina:

Dear Dr. Romance: why are men in their mid 40s-50s attracted to 2

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Dear Dr. Romance:    I was wondering if in any of your books or articles you discuss about why men in their mid 40s-50s might be attracted to 20ish girls. I kind of know the obvious reasons, but being more curious about what that might mean maturity wise etc.  Dear Reader:   From your question, I don't know if ... Read more

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Unless you're completely out of touch with any media, written, audio or video, you have been bombarded with words like "dysfunctional relationship", "codependency" and "toxic family system". You may have noticed that there's a lot of information available about these relationships, but not too much about what to do about ... Read more

Dear Dr. Romance: at funerals, how do you comfort families in mou

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Dear Dr. Romance: What suggestions can you offer for guests at funerals in regards to comforting families in mourning? Thanks! Dear Reader: Your presence at the memorial or funeral, honoring their loved one who passed, is the most comfort, so go if you can. When you are greeting the family at the funeral, simply say "I'm so sorry for ... Read more

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