Dear Dr. Romance:
I'm in need of some help. My partner has had some emotional problems and I don't know what they are. Is she bipolar or something else? She gets angry about everything and is very negative. She is very incecure and thinks I dont love her even if I told her 10 minutes before. She says she needs my constant attention (every second and means it). If I dont focus on her she thinks that I don't love her or need her. She thinks I'm falling out of love with her all the time even if I tell her it's not true. She tells me that I need to speak sweet to her all the time and if I dont something's wrong. She overexaggerates everything. If a car moves slightly over by her lane she says they are trying to run her off the road. I have to talk the way she wants or she starts to fight with me. If I say something it's really bad but if she says it it's ok. This is realy hard to deal with. What's wrong with her? I'm starting to think maybe it's me who is not thinking right? Please help.
It's difficult to tell without talking to your partner directly, but the situation does sound serious. Your partner sounds very anxious, perhaps paranoid. Is counseling available where you are? It's important that both you and your partner get some help. If counseling isn't possible, try talking to a doctor, religious leader or trusted family member. It won't help to fight with your partner, instead it's important that you remain calm. If you become anxious and agitated too, it will increase her anxiety. "Handling Anxiety Effectively" may help, but do get some help. This is probably too big for you to handle alone. "Guidelines for Finding and Using Therapy Wisely" will help you find an appropriate therapist. It Ends With You: Grow Up and Out of Dysfunction.
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