Dr. Romance advises a husband on communicating with his wife.
Dear Dr. Romance:
I suffer with sleeping alone in "our" bedroom while my wife of 14 years, sleeps in our two pre-teen sons' bedroom. I've tried to talk and reason with her about this important problem, only to fall on deaf ears. I'm desperate. What else can i do? How can i get an autographed copy of your book? I do a lot of reading in our bed since not much else ever happens.
It sounds like you need some help getting through to your wife, so why not go for counseling? A counselor would tell her that what she's doing is not good for your sons or your marriage. Be aware that she may want out of the marriage -- do you understand what turned her off? I'm not sure you're telling me everything, and I'm certainly not hearing her side.
Instead of telling her she's wrong, try listening to her side of the story. Maybe you have to change some things about how you deal with each other. "Asking for What You Want"; "Guidelines for Finding and Using Therapy Wisely", "Couples Can Cooperate for Success" and "How to Be Irresistible to Your Mate" are all full of information that can help you find out what the real problem is. I think Love Styles: How to Celebrate Your Differences is the best book for your situation.