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4 Reasons Your Marriage Is Susceptible To Divorce

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serious family sitting on sofa
How fragile is your marriage?
Keep your union strong despite all the forces that try to weaken it.

As a culture, do we invest any time giving people the skills they need to keep a love alive and vibrant? Do we even know what that means, what that looks like, or how to do such a thing? A couple who actively works to improve their relationship IQ weathers life's challenges with more grace, compassion and love. As they keep growing, so does their relationship.

4. We now live a 24/7 lifestyle. This is an entirely new social phenomenon that has never been the case before. People are working 50+ hours a week, on their communication devices all hours of the night and day, expected to be reachable and attending to multiple demands simultaneously — the email from work, the text from a child, the conversation with a partner, the deadline that is tomorrow, the sale that ends tonight. This is impossible … hello?? … this is impossible to do without losing connection with those closest to you. 

More from YourTango: 4 Secrets From Couples Who Maintain Intimacy and Ecstasy

To nourish a meaningful, deeply attached relationship with a child, spouse or friend, to nourish love, you need focused time to be thoughtfully and solely with each other … in the moment … present in the now … open heart to open heart. That is the only way. Distracted connections become weak connections and weak connections, with nothing social or internal holding them together, will in time, break. There is no magic wishing that will suffice … they will break.

More from YourTango: One Small Story of a Mother's Unreasonable Love

If these influences negatively affect your love life, discuss how you can bring more TLC into your relationship. Discuss how to wrap space, time and attention around you by putting in a few protective boundaries. For example, no electronics in bed or 15 minutes of quiet music, a glass of wine and a dimly lit room together before bed. Most importantly, discuss what you miss and how to bring more of that into your busy lives, longing hearts and sacred union.

Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Dr. Tina Schermer-Sellers

Marriage and Family Therapist

Tina Schermer Sellers, PhD

Author, Speaker, Couple's Intimacy Retreat Facilitator, Licenced Marriage and Family Therapist, Certified Sex Therapist, Medical Family Therapist, Clinical Sexologist

Location: SEATTLE, WA
Credentials: LMFT, PhD
Other Articles/News by Dr. Tina Schermer-Sellers:

4 Secrets From Couples Who Maintain Intimacy and Ecstasy

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Do you ever wish you had a 'marriage cheat sheet'?  ... a few 'easy to remember' tips that would help keep your love strong?  In a world that squeezes out fun and crams in more demands ... what are the secrets of those that stay 'in love' and those that 'fall out of love'?  In a recent love and marriage ... Read more

One Small Story of a Mother's Unreasonable Love

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On the last night of our epic three week family vacation we all lay on our backs on a dock on Cascade Lake, Orcas Island to watch a rare meteor shower.  I wish I had a picture of us – side by side in the dark - gazing across an expanse of sky trying to capture every stray streak to launch itself in our direction.  Then a chorus of a gasps would ... Read more

What Is Normal Sexual Curiosity In Kids?

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My son was 3 and bath time meant time with 40 floating toys, lots of bubbles and his snorkeling mask.  It also meant I could make dinner 15 feet away in relative peace.  It was an evening ritual that worked for both of us.  One night he yelled from the tub, “Mommy! Mommy! Come quick, I need to show you something!”  As I ran ... Read more

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