8 Ways Your Anger Will Break Up Your Relationship


how your anger will break up your relationship
Misused anger is one of the biggest reasons for breakups.

3. You displace your anger. This bad habit is also known as the "kick-the-cat" problem. You become angry with a situation that you can't address directly because of possible negative consequences, so you suppress it until a safe target becomes available ... like your partner.

4. You use it as a motivational technique. Typically, your fear is produced through outbursts of anger, often public, accompanied by threats of dire consequences. But respect generated by fear is not true respect at all.


5. You reduce your stress with anger. This is by far the most common emotional misuse of anger. Your frustration is suppressed while you're busy at the office, but once you are safely out of the workplace, that same tension is quickly transformed into anger and expressed at any opportune target (again, like your partner).

6. You're sarcastic. Sarcasm is really mean-spirited anger under the guise of humor. It is very hurtful to the person it is directed toward, but there is little they can say since it is so widely accepted. Someone sophisticated in the art of communication would know to say "that is sarcastic and unacceptable to me." Not too many people realize they have that right to stand up for themselves with something as common as sarcasm.

7. You're afraid of intimacy, so you create emotional distance. Although fairly common, this misuse of anger is sometimes difficult to spot. It comes from an insecurity when you get too close to someone else—especially a significant other. To reduce that implicit threat, you pick a fight. This conflict creates more interpersonal distance and, consequently, less intimacy.

8. You're resentful of giving so much to others (and neglecting yourself). Of course, you want to respond to the needs of others, but a problem occurs when it comes at a personal cost. Deep resentment grows within when you start to think to yourself, "I'm giving so much to everyone else. Why isn't anyone giving anything back to me?"

If you see any of these signs in yourself, contact a mental health specialist to help you. Allow me help you deal with the emotional roadblocks that unhealthy love and toxic relationships can put in your path. Rediscover how to live a healthy, emotionally-fulfilling life. Life is short, so don't let grief and co-dependency  stop you from reaching your goals. Start now: unleash your gifts and let wonders happen in your life. There is possibillity in everything!

This article was originally published at . Reprinted with permission.
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