6. If I'm angry, it's your fault. "You made me mad. I'm only mad because you ... !" Again, blaming others is a narcissistic means of sustaining self-worth. Beware though of getting mad back at a narcissist. They'll respond with fury. They can get mad at you (because it's your fault if they are mad) but all hell is likely to break loose if you should dare to show even slight irritation toward them!
What are your options if these signs indicate narcissism is likely?
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Knowledge is power. Pay attention if you see signs of narcissism in yourself. Narcissism is basically habit-patterns and habits can be changed. Awareness of your own narcissistic tendencies can empower you to notice and fix slippages.
If someone you interact with regularly has narcissistic patterns, there is no need to panic. You may benefit from changes in the habitual ways you react to that person. For instance, if your favorite narcissist is prone to anger, get out of the way. Gracefully exit the situation for a few minutes to let him cool down. Just say, "I need to get a drink of water ... be back in a minute."
Also, remember verbal stones people hurl when they are mad generally do not represent what they feel in normal emotional times. In fact, check out if the criticisms of you are actually quite good desriptions of the person from whose mouth the criticisms have come. For example, check if they are what psychologists call projections. (Do take seriously though the threats of abusive people. They are likely eventually do implement these threats.)
Having trouble getting your view heard? Say it again. Or ask, "So what made sense to you in what I said?"
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Become a master at win-win problem-solving. If you take a leadership role in being sure your concerns as well as his become important, you'll be less likely to cave in to his way just to keep him calm.