15 Spontaneous Ways To Make Your Sex Life Even Hotter

By , , ,

how to make sex hotter
Challenge #14: Be in rare form! Spontaneity is a key ingredient to exciting sex.

"Dessert, anyone?" Take a photo of a can of whipped cream and send it to your partner with a teasing note that it's a treat for later tonight. —Meri-Arnett Kremian

Surprise him and do something completely out of character. If you're usually a bit prim and proper, excuse yourself during a black tie event, head for the ladies' room, remove your lace panties and sneakily tuck them into his jacket pocket. The intrigue along with knowing that you're exposed — may make him decide to leave early (or book a hotel room upstairs). —Meri-Arnett Kremian


Dress in your sexiest, most sensual lingerie. The lights may be off, but what you wear (or don't wear) still makes a difference in how sexy you feel. In other words, that granny nightgown might be better off left in your bottom drawer. —Dr. Susan Heitler

... And meet him in nothing but that. Greet him at the door wearing nothing but your hottest lingerie. If you're concerned about the neighbors seeing you, wear an overcoat or bathrobe and let it drop to the floor as soon as he shuts the door. It will be a wonderful surprise for him and he won't be able to keep his hands off you. —Jane Garapick

Step into a pair of your highest heels. Slip on some stilettos, they make your legs look longer and make you feel feminine and sexy (not to mention, the guys love it.) Marla Martenson

Hop in the shower for some slippery fun. The rules? Wash every inch each other — skin to skin. What guy isn't responsive to having you lovingly caress him? And what woman doesn't love feeling her man's hands on her body? Mix in warm water, lots of steam, lavender-scented shower gel and pumpkin-scented candles (two smells shown to increase penile blood flow) and the rest should follow naturally. —Meri-Arnett Kremian

Play some sensual music to set the mood. Don't have any ideas? Did you know that a study by Spotify found that the number one favorite music for arousing sexual feelings was the soundtrack from Dirty Dancing? —Dr. Susan Heitler

Sound-proof your room (so you can be louder). Buy bean bags to stuff under the door, in the window and any other corners where sounds sneak through. —Dr. Susan Heitler

Give him a blindfolded rubdown. Blindfold him and subject him to 30 minutes of pure pleasure. Warm your hands with massage oil and run your fingers over his face, down his chest and abs until you work your way down to between his legs. Make it a game: how long can hold out before he reaches for you? Can he last the full half hour? (We doubt it.) You might also inspire him to be your personal masseur. Happy endings, anyone? —Meri-Arnett Kremian

Remember what turned you on about him in the first place. When you have a few quiet moments, take that time to remind yourself of what you found incredibly sexy about him early on in your relationship. Was it his strong arms, his walk or the way he smelled? Was it his gorgeous eyes or the fact that he's so handy with tools (and looked oh-so good in his tool belt)? Write down 3 to 5 of them on an index card and read it to yourself every day. The next time the two of you begin to be intimate, run through these in your mind. This will bring you into the moment, he'll notice the change in you and you'll both feel more connected. —Jane Garapick

Article contributed by

Marla Martenson


Marla Martenson, matchmaker & author of Diary of a Beverly Hills Matchmaker

Location: Los Angeles, CA
Credentials: Other
Advanced Member

Jane Garapick

Dating Coach

Jane Garapick knows firsthand what it’s like to have a broken heart, a broken dream, and a broken you. She writes about adventures on the rocky road to finding Mr. Right at her website www.gettingtotruelove.com.

To get started on your own personal journey to true love, download Jane's complimentary guide "Find Your True Love: 10 Simple Steps to Getting the Love You Want...and Deserve"

You can also follow her on Twitter @JaneGarapick and "like" her page on Facebook

Location: Bellingham, WA
Credentials: Other
Other Articles/News by Marla Martenson, Jane Garapick:

Are You Too Fat To Date A Millionaire?


I know, I know! I can already hear you. "Are you too fat to date a millionaire?...Did she really go there? Now before you send a lynch mob after me, hear me out.  Because if you are one of those gals that think you absolutely want to marry or begin dating a multi-millionaire, you might want to think again! Before I became a matchmaker, I ... Read more

Want To Smile More? Say "I Do" To Your Life Right Now.


Human beings are social creatures, and we're wired to feel more secure when we're part of a group. There's no better way to feel this security than by being in a long-term relationship. So while we can recognize on a purely conscious level that we don't need a committed partner in order to be happy, the truth is that a desire for long term ... Read more
Latest Expert Videos
Must-see Videos
Most Popular