After being together with my wife for 32 years and married for 26 years; coupled with successful marital coaching of many couples during my 25 years of practice, has led me to some major distinctions.
In today's throwaway society it is far too easy to abandon ship and move on. While sometimes moving on is the absolute right thing to do, sometimes staying together and working things out should prevail.
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Relationships, like everything in life ebb and flow. The new and exciting hormonal excitement that you get week one is different but still great 5, 10, 15, and 25 years later. My experience both personally and professionally has taught me to know specifically what you are looking for, go slow and don't mistake hormones for love.
Ok so you are looking of that perfect someone, what should you do. The first thing and don't laugh is to literally write down a list so you know specifically the traits of the person that you are looking for. Writing the traits down is extremely powerful because it lets the universe know which will allow the Laws of Attraction to start helping you. Be honest with yourself and be specific.
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How tall is he? What color eyes, hair, socioeconomic background, and type of job does he have? Does she smoke or drink? Does she take illicit drugs? Does he like movies, plays, shopping and the beach? Does he always want to go out and party? Is her personality warm, inviting, and attractive? Does he get along with your family? Does his family get along with you? Is he good in bed? Does she want to do it as often as you do? Be specific and literally write down everything that you can think of.
Next step is to prioritize the list. Since life is about give and take it is always best to know what you will give up and tolerate in advance, rather than having to make a decision when you are caught up in the heat of the moment. Let me give you an example. Let’s say that a smoker is a total turn off and there is no way that you will be with a smoker. You also would prefer a red-head to a blonde. Now you meet someone who is a red-headed smoker. Since you decided that you could never be with a smoker in advance move on immediately. I promise there will be a perfect red-headed non-smoker out there. Now you may be asking, but what if they quit when they found out that smoking is not tolerable to me? My answer to that is simple. Why start a relationship on shaky ground. Smoking is an addiction that he or she may not be able to stop. While the intention may be there, the addiction may be stronger; or the person may quit for you in the beginning of the relationship and 9 months later decides that they miss it and go back. My point is give your relationship the best opportunity to succeed based on the list of criteria that you make ahead of time. Proper planning for anything is essential.