According to Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh’s Tantra, Spirituality and Sex - my first exposure to Tantra many years ago - once you know bliss, you are grounded in reality. The reality is that in deep sexual orgasm, it is not sex that gives you bliss. Once again, sex is only the vehicle. Something else is generating the euphoria, the ecstasy. That something else, according to Rajneesh, can be divided into three elements - timelessness, egolessness and being natural. These are the components that produce ecstasy and bliss.
I know all of this might sound strange or simply corny, but bear with me. Even Tantric teachers say that practice and experience must precede belief. Transcendence comes through experience, not through ideology. My challenge to you is to begin to think of sexual pleasure and orgasm in a different way.
In the Moment
For a Tantric orgasm to occur, there is no need for a build up of sexual tension, for friction, for ejaculation or for muscular contractions. In fact, there is no need for sex at all once you have discovered that orgasm can be a deeply relaxing meditation, a state combining Rajneesh’s three components of timelessness, egolessness and being natural.
When you are timeless you are in the moment, not comparing to past experience or focusing on future expectations. When you are egoless, you become one with your partner or the universe, not an individual limited by physical disability or negative thoughts. When you are in your natural state, in the words of Rajneesh, "The unreal is lost; the facade, the face, is lost; the society, the culture, the civilization is lost. You are part of nature - as trees are, animals are, stars are. You are in a greater something - the cosmos."
Still seem far-fetched? Well consider this. Drs. Beverly Whipple, Gina Ogden and Barry Komisaruk have shown in laboratory studies at Rutgers University that women can have orgasms through fantasy alone, without any physical stimulation. Some of the women’s orgasms were not associated with genital contractions. Still skeptical? Think this only applies to nondisabled women? My research with men and women with spinal cord injuries documents experiences that were identified as orgasm by the participants but could hardly be described as medical-model orgasms. While some participants still experienced traditional orgasms, others - of both sexes - said their orgasms happened "by surprise." There was not the usual buildup of muscular tension, yet ecstatic feelings occurred in their heads or entire bodies, even for those with no sensation below their level of injury. Is your mind beginning to open to new possibilities?