Pain-Free Sex for Dad

By

Pain-Free Sex for Dad
Sex can be painful for men, too. Here's how--and what to do about it

A woman’s teeth are among Man’s Best Friends—when used soberly and consciously. As with all sexual activities, the variation in what different men like in biting, oral sex, and nipple play is very broad. There’s no substitute for asking, and darn those guys who say “everything is great, I love everything.” No one except Godzilla (and my pathologically passive Uncle Dave) likes everything.

Finally, let’s remember that the most common source of painful sex for men has nothing to do with their penis. It’s unromantic, unfunny chronic pain: lower back, neck, knees, hands. Some ibuprofen an hour before sex can help, but long-term conditions like arthritis and carpal tunnel syndrome are stronger than any drug that doesn’t render you unconscious.

Most people don’t like to discuss these things, fearing they’re a terrible turn-off for both parties. If your guy is struggling with chronic pain, be pushy—insist that you find positions that minimize his discomfort, and insist that he’s still sexy to you.

Then, as my editors are always telling me, don’t just say it—show it.

Happy Father’s Day to you both.

Dr. Marty Klein is a marriage counselor and sex therapist with 30 years experience. His latest book is SEXUAL INTELLIGENCE: What We Really Want From Sex, and How to Get It. Dr. Klein’s blog, newsletter and more at www.MartyKlein.com.

Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Dr. Marty Klein

Author

Dr. Marty Klein is a Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist and Certified Sex Therapist.

In his award-winning books lectures, newsletter, and therapy, he helps men & women understand and accept themselves and their sexuality, reducing their feelings of guilt, shame, anxiety, and isolation.

Dr. Klein's new book is Sexual Intelligence. Psychology Today says, "Read this book if you want to improve your sex life." To connect with Dr. Klein, see his provocative newsletter.

Location: Palo Alto, CA
Credentials: MFT, PhD
Specialties: Couples/Marital Issues, Infidelity / Affair Recovery, Sexuality
Other Articles/News by Dr. Marty Klein:

What Do People Want To Know About Sex?

By

What do people want to know about sex? At the invitation of YourTango.com, I just spent the day on a panel with four other sexuality professionals. Our mission? List some of the most common questions about sex — and answer them. We pretty much agreed on the sexual topics people want to know more about: desire, pornography, cheating, male-female ... Read more

Symptoms of Sex Addiction? No

By

Maybe you think about sex a lot, maybe all the time. Perhaps you masturbate every day, and maybe you do it with lots of pornography. Maybe you want sex more than your partner—a lot more. Perhaps you wish your partner were more sexually adventurous. Maybe you make terrible decisions about sex. Maybe you take risks, and in the process maybe you've ... Read more

Emotional Intimacy: How Being Vulnerable Can Lead To Red-Hot Sex

By

Want better sex? Of course you do. Instead of reaching for a blindfold, a porn video or a cocktail (not that there's anything wrong with those things), how about something less tangible and more effective: enhancing the emotional intimacy in your sexual relationship? As a therapist, I think of intimacy as your willingness to be yourself — to be ... Read more

See More

GET MORE ARTICLES LIKE THIS IN YOUR INBOX!

Sign up for our daily email and get the stories everyone is talking about.

Ask The Experts

Have a dating or relationship question?
Visit Ask YourTango and let our experts and community answer.

FROM AROUND THE WEB