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Are You Fascinated with Heroes?


Clinical Sexologist Dr. Martha Tara Lee suggests seven ways you can return to your true brilliance.

Our fascination with heroes may well have started with all the comic books we read, and the action hero figurines we played with growing up.

Lately, I've been watching a lot of reality shows.

I am especially fascinated with a new breed of kids who are being born who are pure love, light and joy.

Their presence brings a healing to our hearts.

This is Alexa. Last year, she was 10 when she won The Voice Kids. Listen to her here.

She's 10! Isn't she amazing?

She not only has a great voice, but also confidence and joy that shines from within.

We love watching magnificence and brilliance, because this is our true nature.

We might find ourselves moved ot tears, because our soul is being reminded...

We are meant to shine.

Along the way, we forget how to.

We were born perfect.

We become downtrodden and plagued with insecurities.

Return to Brilliance

Well, this is your lucky day because here's a reminder:

  1. Make this decision - Decide to return to brilliance. Commit to being the best version of who you can be or are always meant to be. Making the decision is the first step.
  2. Explore - What could you do now that you have decided? What feels like the next logical step? Would making a list help? Could exploring your sexuality be one of the areas you could look into?
  3. Draw inspiration - Do you have role models? If not, who might one be? Perhaps your role model is not even real but from the comic books you read, and the action hero figurines you played with growing up? Channel this thing. What might Mother Theresa, Princess Diana or Bill Gates have done?
  4. Try - We learned through trial and error growing up, and yet grow up hesitant to try anything new. Part of being a bigger and better person is stretching your comfort zones and exploring what might feel uncomfortable. If you were to choose one thing to do, what might it be? Baby steps are still solid way-forwards which can gather momentum over time!
  5. Seek help - We can't do it alone, and we certainly don't need to do it alone. Ask for support from a friend, loved one, colleague, mentor or even coach (like myself!).
  6. Revisit - From time to time, re-examine the progress you've made in being a better, stronger, wiser and more inspiring person. What else is next?
  7. Celebrate - People assume there is much honour in pain and suffering. We don't need to be so hard on ourselves all the time. Celebration of our successes anchor us to the present. Celebrations remind me of how far we have come, and they motivate us to continue, so please, celebrate your wins!

Quit listening to Hero.

Stop thinking that only some people can be heroes.

Cease waiting for some hero to come rescue you.

You are the hero of your life.

Dr. Martha Tara Lee is Founder and Clinical Sexologist of Eros Coaching. She is a certified sexologist with a Doctorate in Human Sexuality. She provides sexuality and relationship coaching for individuals and couples, conducts sexual education workshops and speaks at public events. She is the author of the book Love, Sex and Everything In-Between, and the host of the weekly radio show Eros Evolution on OMTimes Radio. For more, visit or email

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This article was originally published at Eros Coaching. Reprinted with permission from the author.


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