However, these patterns do not disappear just because you move into another relationship. You take your overt and covert forms of control with you into any relationship, as well as your underlying fears of rejection and engulfment that underlie these forms of control. These patterns do not generally show up early in a relationship or in an emotional or physical affair, but that does not mean they are gone. If your new relationship were to become your committed primary relationship, these patterns would resurface.
Why waste what might turn out to be a wonderful relationship by not dealing with your fears, controlling patterns and self-abandonment now? Instead of addictively looking to someone else to fill up your emptiness and take away your loneliness, why not learn to do this for yourself so that you can break your dysfunctional patterns and become the loving person that you are capable of being? Imagine the wonderful relationship you and your partner might have if both of you were to learn how to take responsibility for your own feelings and your own ability to love. Should I End This Relationship?
More from YourTango: 15 Most Unattractive Things Women Do In Relationships
To begin learning how to love and connect with yourself so that you can connect with your partner and others, take advantage of our free Inner Bonding eCourse, receive Free Help, and take our 12-Week home study eCourse, "The Intimate Relationship Toolbox" – the first two weeks are free!
More from YourTango: 7 Signs You're An Overbearing Girlfriend
Connect with Margaret on Facebook.