Loving Your Spouse But Not Feeling Loved?
By Dr. Margaret Paul. Posted on .
Then we moved on to another aspect of Inner Bonding. "Marlo, do you have a source of spiritual guidance you turn to?"
"Yes," she replied. "I'm a Christian and I turn to Jesus."
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"Good," I said. "Now you need to start asking Jesus for information regarding the loving action toward yourself. You do this by asking a question, such as, 'Jesus, what would the loving action be toward myself when Jack is angry with me?' or 'What is in my highest good when my children are being demanding or disrespectful toward me?' Then imagine what Jesus might say to you. You might have to make it up for awhile, but after awhile you will begin to experience that Jesus is actually answering you. You will begin to experience two-way communication between you and Jesus. Are you willing to try this?"
Marlo was willing. I cautioned her that Jack and her children might be upset with her for awhile, because they were used to her being a caretaker, but that if they really loved her and wanted her to be happy, they would end up supporting her in loving herself.
"But what if Jack just stays mad?" she asked.
"Well, then you can decide what is in your highest good. But until you are loving to yourself, you will not know the truth about Jack. Most of the people I've worked with have found that when they are practicing Inner Bonding and are loving to themselves long enough, their whole relationship improves. I can't guarantee it, but isn't it worth a try, rather than just giving up?"
"Yes, I don't really want to leave Jack. I'm excited about this. I finally have some hope for our relationship!"
Marlo learned and practiced Inner Bonding. While Jack did get mad for awhile, he didn't stay mad for long. In fact, Marlo was thrilled to discover that Jack was actually treating her more lovingly!
To begin learning how to love and connect with yourself so that you can connect with your partner and others, take advantage of our free Inner Bonding eCourse, receive Free Help, and take our 12-Week home study eCourse, "The Intimate Relationship Toolbox" – the first two weeks are free!
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