• Learn to connect with a spiritual source of truth so that you can begin to heal these beliefs.
• Through your spiritual connection, begin to see and lovingly define your your true self. When you truly see the beauty of your essence, you will know that you do not have to give yourself up to be loved.
• Come into truth about what you can and cannot control. What if you 100% accepted that you cannot control others' feelings about you – no matter how much you give yourself up?
In order to heal and no longer give yourself up in relationships, you need to be prepared to fully accept your lack of control over others' feelings about you. While you can influence others' feelings, you cannot control them, and all the things you do to try to control them – such as giving yourself up – eventually backfire. Others can feel the energy and the pull of inauthenticity, and will often do the opposite of what you want – which is to resist your control. No one likes to be controlled, and often, when someone feels that the other person is giving themselves up, they feel controlled by it and will resist.
Would you really want to end up in a relationship where you can't be yourself? Do you really want to have to work that hard, and end up losing yourself, to try to attract another person?
You will stop doing this when you get to know and value your essence, and you can do this only through seeing yourself through the eyes of your spiritual Guidance. Your programmed mind decided a long time ago that you are not good enough, and as long as you believe this lie, you will continue to lose yourself to try to control.
Join Dr. Margaret Paul for her new 30-Day at-home Course: "Love Yourself: An Inner Bonding Experience to Heal Anxiety, Depression, Shame, Addictions and Relationships."
To begin learning how to love and connect with yourself so that you can connect with your partner and others, take advantage of our free Inner Bonding eCourse, receive Free Help, and take our 12-Week home study eCourse, "The Intimate Relationship Toolbox" – the first two weeks are free! ! Discover SelfQuest®, a transformational self-healing/conflict resolution computer program. Phone or Skype sessions with Dr. Margaret Paul.