The Feeling Of Love, The Actions Of Love

By

The Feeling Of Love, The Actions Of Love
Discover why some seemingly loving actions are controlling rather than loving.

Is there a difference between the feeling of love and the actions of love? Yes!

The Feeling of Love

 

When you feel love, you have a wonderful warm full feeling in your heart. It is the feeling that enters your heart when you open your heart.

The feeling of love is not a feeling that you generate from within your own physical body. It is a feeling that you invite into your heart through your intention. When your intention is to learn about loving yourself and others, your heart opens and you feel the fullness of love in your heart.

Love is God, Spirit, the energy that we live in and that we are in our essence. We live within love and love lives within us, but we cannot feel the love unless our heart is open to it.

John 4:24
"God is Spirit, and those who worship Him must worship in spirit and truth."

1 John 4:8
He who does not love does not know God, for God is love."

1 John 4:16
"God is love, and he who abides in love abides in God, and God in him.

When your intention is to protect against your pain with some form of controlling behavior—controlling your feelings, or attempting to control others—your heart closes and you cannot feel the feeling of love. Your intention to protect/control, or to learn/love determines whether or not you feel the feeling of love.

The feeling of love is a great gift of Spirit, which we invite into our hearts whenever we open to learning about loving.

The Actions of Love

The actions of love come from the feeling of love. When we are open to learning and we are being loving ourselves, our hearts becomes so filled with love that it overflows and we want to share it with others through our actions of love.

It is the feeling of love that generates actions of love.

Can we act loving without feeling loving? Yes. And sometimes acting loving can open our hearts and we then feel loving, but this is not always the case. It depends on your intent.

If your intent in acting loving is to get something from someone—to get love, approval, attention, sex, money and so on, then your action is not loving. For example, getting your partner flowers or making a special meal for him or her might seem like loving action. But if your intent in doing something special for your partner is to get something you want, then the action is manipulative rather than loving. Because most of us are sensitive to energy, we can feel the difference between an action coming from love with no strings attached, and an action intended to control.

When you believe that the love you need has to come from a person rather than from Spirit, then you might find yourself constantly trying to get love with your controlling behavior.

This article was originally published at Inner Bonding . Reprinted with permission.
Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Dr. Margaret Paul

Author

Margaret Paul, Ph.D. is a best-selling author of 8 books, relationship expert, and co-creator of the powerful Inner Bonding® process - featured on Oprah, and recommended by actress Lindsay Wagner and singer Alanis Morissette. Are you are ready to heal your pain and discover your joy? Take our FREE Inner Bonding course, and click here for a FREE CD/DVD relationship offer. Visit our website at innerbonding.com for more articles and help, as well as our Facebook Page. Phone and Skype sessions available. Join the thousands we have already helped and visit us now!

Location: Pacific Palisades, CA
Credentials: PhD
Specialties: Anxiety Issues, Couples/Marital Issues, Depression
Other Articles/News by Dr. Margaret Paul:

Relationships: The Power of Goodwill

By

Research into good marriages indicates that the most important choice healthy couples make is to have goodwill toward each other. This may seems like a simple requirement, yet many couples have anything but goodwill toward each other. Instead, they make it far more important to: • Attempt to control each other with criticism, judgments, blame, anger, ... Read more

“I Feel Overwhelmed”

By

I often hear from my clients that they feel overwhelmed. Generally, feeling overwhelmed means one of three things: • Overwhelmed by their feelings • Overwhelmed by time pressures • Overwhelmed by how to do things ‘right’ The feeling of overwhelm is generally caused by how we are treating ourselves and what we are telling ... Read more

How To Love Instead Of Reacting To Triggers In Relationships

By

All of us have "triggers" that set off our fear or anxiety and may lead to our reactivity—anger, defensiveness, withdrawal, compliance or resistance. We are especially triggered in our important love relationships. Take a moment right now to think about what, in your relationships, triggers you into your fear or anxiety. Are you ... Read more

See More

 
PARTNER POSTS