11 Wacky Signs Your Sex Life Is Totally Normal

By

Signs your sex life is normal
Challenge #1: Find out what the heck 'normal' is anyway.

7. You like kinky sex.
One of my clients, a young and powerful young woman, was questioning herself because she liked it when her boyfriend was controlling in bed — in charge and spanking her. She thought there was something wrong with her for liking this. She didn't like being hurt and he wouldn't actually hurt her, but she did like the vulnerability of being controlled. I assured her that there was nothing at all wrong with this as long as they both enjoyed it. There is a reason why Fifty Shades of Grey was such a bestseller!

8. Dirty talk is necessary to get the fires stoked.
If one person wants more emotional connection or more romance, then it can become a problem, but a little naughty whispering isn't an issue as long as you both enjoy it!

 

9. You like to have covert sex somewhere in public.
Naughty sex can be fun! Play under the table in a restaurant — finding a way to play with each other while looking like nothing is happening can be fun and exciting!

10. You use sex toys.
Sex toys can add great pleasure to your sex life. If the only way you have an orgasm is with a vibrator, go for it! If you are curious about the various sex toys, take an excursion to your local sex store or go on line to learn what is available — and what would be fun for you.

11. You like to have a drink or two before making love.
If booze loosens you up and allows you to have more fun with each other, then no problem. Sometimes booze can effect performance and may become a problem or it leads to emotional disconnection, but as long as it is working for both of you, then have fun!

I hope you can see that anything both of you enjoy and isn't causing you or anyone else harm is part of a normal sex life. Problems come into your sex life when you give yourself up and go along with something you don't want. This is what is not healthy. As long as you both want it and it isn't harming anyone, then enjoy it!

Check back every day at 21 Days To A Better Sex Life — and tell us, what's your secret to a smokin' hot sex life?

Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Dr. Margaret Paul

Author

Margaret Paul, Ph.D. is a best-selling author of 8 books, relationship expert, and co-creator of the powerful Inner Bonding® process - featured on Oprah, and recommended by actress Lindsay Wagner and singer Alanis Morissette. Are you are ready to heal your pain and discover your joy? Take our FREE Inner Bonding course, and click here for a FREE CD/DVD relationship offer. Visit our website at innerbonding.com for more articles and help, as well as our Facebook Page. Phone and Skype sessions available. Join the thousands we have already helped and visit us now!

Location: Pacific Palisades, CA
Credentials: PhD
Specialties: Anxiety Issues, Couples/Marital Issues, Depression
Other Articles/News by Dr. Margaret Paul:

Trusting Others Starts With Trusting Yourself

By

"I have a hard time trusting people." "I never feel like I can trust my husband (or wife)." It is very common for me in my work as a counselor to hear the above statements. Trust issues abound in relationships. However, resolving trust issues is not about getting another person to be trustworthy. It's about you become a ... Read more

How To Become Free

By

I used to think that to become free you had to practice like a samurai warrior, but now I understand that you have to practice like a devoted mother of a newborn child. It takes the same energy but has a completely different quality. It's compassion and presence rather than having to defeat the enemy in battle. ~Jack Kornfield, "The ... Read more

Is He Pushing Your Buttons? 5 Ways To Walk Away Without A Fight

By

We all have many addictive ways of avoiding feeling our painful feelings and taking responsibility for them, especially in a long-term relationship or marriage. Some ways are obvious, such as substance abuse, but some ways can be very subtle, such as picking a fight with your partner under the guise of effective communication. Take a look. Do you see your ... Read more

See More

 
My Videos
ASK YOURTANGO MORE QUESTIONS
Must-see Videos
SEE MORE VIDEOS
Most Popular