New Year's Resolutions that you really need to give up to actually have more fun in 2013.
Each year millions of women (and men) vow to lose weight. Apparently, only about 5% of them succeed for any length of time. From my observations, the ones that don’t succeed spend the rest of the year obsessing about their weight and their lack of weight loss success. How many more years of your life do you want to spend thinking about your weight, clothes size, number on a scale, or your next diet? What fabulous things are you missing out on because you’ve given so much of your energy to either dieting or cheating on your diet?
Here’s the bottom line on weight loss, it’s not about the food. I think you know this but it’s good to be reminded of it by a snarky life coach who thinks you are wasting your life on the next diet. So if it’s not about the food, it’s about you. My very limited (but I think rather brilliant) scientific study suggests that women diet or cheat on their diets for two reasons. The first is that they want to look like a Victoria’s Secret Angel or the second because something else is missing inside of them and it sure isn’t food.
Let’s get the first one out of the way. The Angels must be hungry and those angel wings won’t fit into your car. So is that really how you want to spend your time, hungry and schlepping around plastic wings on your back? Let’s get to the real issue and some worthwhile resolutions. Something is missing in your life and it’s time to figure out what it is. I’m insisting that these be your New Year’s resolutions from now until the end of time.
- Resolve to let other’s live their lives and you actually live yours. If you hear yourself saying, “My kids are my life” “My dog is my life” “Food is my life” who is living your life? Apparently it is not you. Let other people and things be in your life and you go have one of your own. In case you forgot, you can’t have much of a life if you are focused on food or lack thereof. Women, particularly mothers, seem to believe that others are more important than they are and thus get into the self sacrificing, miserable martyr doom loop. Don’t do it. No one wins in this scenario.
- “Do one thing a day that scares you.” This, a direct quote from the very famous 21st century philosopher, the Lululemon bag. It’s actually a brilliant idea and will most likely keep you from obsessing about your diet or lack thereof. It will also guarantee that you succeed in resolution #1 (see above). What are you most afraid of? Asking for a raise, changing careers, working outside of the house, bungee jumping, writing your novel, dating, ending a relationship? Whatever it is, this is the year to do it. Nothing is as wonderful as moving past fear and finding that the other side is better than you could have imagined. Find your voice, conquer your fears, and you won’t need to bother with a diet.
- Figure out what makes you happy, fulfilled, and motivated then do it everyday. This sounds simple but must not be because most people aren’t doing this. Women walk into my office weighed down with responsibilities, guilt, and overwhelm. Most of them haven’t even considered living their own dream. For some reason they don’t think they are worthy of it. That’s BS! You will be a better partner, parent, friend, professional, and human being if you take care of your own needs. So what is your dream and why aren’t you living it? What are you waiting for, 2014?