Are You Causing Your Own Jealousy?

By

Are You Causing Your Own Jealousy?
You may be surprised to learn that jealousy has a lot more to do with YOU than your partner.

Understanding the roots, triggers and reasons for our feelings of jealousy is an important part of maintaining a healthy relationship. To do this, we must be aware of the critical inner voices driving our uncertainties and self-doubt. If we can identify these thoughts, we can challenge them as the "smiling enemies" they are, the ones that want us to wind up alone. We can act against the thoughts that tell us to be suspicious, mistrusting and accusatory.

Though challenging these thoughts may initially make us anxious and may even intensify the voice attacks in the short run, in the long run it will strengthen us as individuals and improve our trust and communication with our partners. The more we weaken this internal enemy, the more we strengthen a positive sense of self. This will enable us to accept the reality that we are loved and reject the misperception that we are going to be betrayed. And if there were an infidelity, we would be much better able to get through it if we weren’t letting our critical inner voice get the better of us.

Read More About Relationships from Dr. Lisa Firestone

Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Dr. Lisa Firestone

Author

Dr. Lisa Firestone PhD

Director of Research and Education

The Glendon Association

www.glendon.org

www.psychalive.org

(805) 681-0415 x216

Location: Santa Barbara, CA
Credentials: PhD
Specialties: Anxiety Issues, Communication Problems, Couples/Marital Issues, Depression, Family Support, Parenting, Stress Management
Other Articles/News by Dr. Lisa Firestone:

7 Reasons Most People Fear Love

By

Around this time last year, Virgin Mobile USA proclaimed Feb. 13 to be “National Breakup Day.” They did so after conducting a survey in which 59 percent of people said that if they were looking to end their relationship, they would hypothetically do so before Valentine’s Day to save money. The beginning of the year is often said to see a spike ... Read more

Creating Loving Relationships: A Weekend Workshop Retreat

By

Description: This workshop will explore the actions that go into making love last. Participants will learn techniques to identify and challenge the ways they defend themselves and create barriers to genuine intimacy and explore methods to challenge their fear of intimacy. Mindfulness exercises will be practiced throughout the weekend. Open to Individuals ... Read more

It's Not You, It's Me: Turning A Breakup Excuse Into Love Advice

By

Anyone who's done their share of dating has probably been on one side or the other of the, "it's not you, it's me" routine. These five common words, which strive for compassion, in reality just leave our exes confused and puzzling over what went wrong. No one buys this explanation... and why should they? After all, most perpetrators of the ... Read more

See More

PARTNER POSTS
Latest Expert Videos
ASK YOURTANGO MORE QUESTIONS
Most Popular