In last week’s article, “The Magic of Heartbreak”, I shared with you that you must start to accept the fact that EVERYTHING happens for a reason- and it serves you, if you let it. Including and especially your relationships that didn’t work out.
I also shared with you the importance of starting to perceive your STRONG EMOTIONS as guideposts for you to move toward the life of your dreams. They tell you what your spirit truly wants and truly doesn’t want. These are important clues to KNOWING who the RIGHT man is for you… and who is NOT Mr. Right!
What you want to do is to learn how to tap into your “Inner Knower”- that intuition inside that tells you the right path to go on.
So let’s do a little enlightening exercise here to help you start to find your inner guide, shall we? (and keep in mind that this is an exercise that you will want to go over eventually regarding every major romantic relationship you’ve been involved with, give yourself time, this won’t happen overnight) You will need a piece of paper or a journal for this.
1. What’s the name of the person who you either dated or were married to who hurt you enough in some way that you two are not together anymore? Write the name down and then briefly, write out what this person did to you that hurt you.
2. Now, what did you learn about yourself from the pain and the heartbreak? (Example: I learned that I am a strong and resilient woman, or I learned that I need to gather support around me when I go through a break up). Write this down, as much as you can think of.
3. And what did you commit to NEVER experiencing again as a result of this pain? (For instance, I swore that I’d NEVER be with a man who slept around on me again). Write this down.
4. Now, write out an aspect of who your soulmate is from that commitment above. (For example, My soulmate is monogamous and committed to our relationship 100%.) In other words, the OPPOSITE of who this ex-husband was. Insert: next step, what are the qualities that would lead the person to be faithful, ex. honesty, integrity, communicative, thinks and embodies and expresses that you are enough.
This is a HUGE aspect of your soulmate. This is one of the clues that will help you recognize him when you eventually start to date him.
Do you see how the pain you experienced led you to know more who your soulmate IS and of course who he is not?
Let’s take this further.
5. What aspects of a past relationship did you most adore and cherish? What STRONG “POSITIVE” FEELINGS did you experience throughout this relationship? (for example, he made me feel safe, adored. He thought my body was beautiful. He was kind to me.) Write them down- as many as you can in your journal.
Now, from those STRONG “POSITIVE” FEELINGS, write out some aspects of who your soulmate is and how you’ll feel when you’re with him/her.
You see, those STRONG “POSITIVE” AND STRONG “NEGATIVE” FEELINGS are your clues to who he/she IS!