In my opinion, the myth of the perfect wedding exists because it makes us feel better. We unconsciously think that if we don't plan the perfect wedding, then we won't have a perfect marriage. And we all want good marriages, right? The thought of not ending up with a good marriage scares the bejeezus out of us. Engaged & Terrified: What Your Fear Is All About
Instead of focusing on our fears regarding making this life altering commitment to another person, we pour our energy instead into the gift bags that our guests will receive (been there, done that). So, my prescription is simple: surrender and take action.
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- Surrender to the idea that you can't predict the future (no one can guarantee that they'll have a wonderful marriage);
- Surrender to the fact that you won’t be able to achieve a "perfect" wedding no matter how much money and time you spend on it; and
- Surrender to the uncertainty.
And then, do something about it.
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- Remind yourself that you will not have a perfect wedding (no such thing exists);
- Remind yourself that you will not be a perfect bride (she doesn't exist as well); and
- Most importantly, remind yourself that your wedding day is not a reflection of how perfect or imperfect your marriage will be.
Tell yourself that what is a reflection of how healthy your upcoming marriage will be is how hard you and your partner work now on your relationship