Be A Prepared Scout for A Good Relationship


Be A Prepared Scout for A Good Relationship
Having the proper expectations about your marriage is important for it's success!

Aside from being a relationship expert in private practice, I also teach at a local university.  Recently, I had the opportunity to teach a class on Relationships and Marriage. A great deal of the material is devoted to providing proper expectations. One of the students said that she felt the course should be mandatory for all college students. I believe many of us in the field would agree with her.

So many couples commit themselves to one another without really knowing what a long-term partnership requires. (To help couples, I created Marriage Tips That Actually Work.) As a relationship coach, I do think overall there is more education being offered to help this process. Couples are being informed about things like how to communicate better, having the same values, discussing if they want kids and how they’ll parent, etc. I’ll address some of these in later blogs.

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Today, I want to mention an idea that I don’t think gets spoken about too often. I’m reminded of a client who came to me after being married for a short while. She was very distressed because she didn’t feel the same amount of love she had in the past. Without much hesitation, I reassured her that what she was talking about was pretty normal. In fact, throughout marriage, even healthy empowered ones, there are times you don’t feel the love … and then you do. It comes in waves. Her response, in relief, was: “No one tells you that!”

Especially in the hectic world that we live in, it’s very easy to disconnect from your partner. It takes being really mindful and making your relationship a priority to keep it on course. But even with such awareness, you’re human; and so, your feelings vary. But if you don’t know this, it can be scary. (And certainly after many years, relationships get stale.  Luckily, there are ways to revitalize your relationships!)

Don’t go running if you should notice this happening to you. Chances are very good that it will pass. If it continues for a long time, then you might want to look at what needs aren’t being addressed and have a discussion with your partner. It’s important to take care of you and your relationship. By doing so, you will be able to empower your relationship!

Dr. Karen

More from YourTango: 5 Playful Ways To Spend Valentine's Day With Your Spouse

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Dr. Karen Sherman


Dr. Karen Sherman is a Psychologist and radio host of Your Empowered Relationship as well as the co-author of "Marriage Magic! Find It, Keep It, and Make it Last" and award winning "Mindfulness and The Art of Choice: Transform Your Life." Her experet advice is sought after in print, radio, and TV. 
Connect with Dr. Karen through her FREE 21-day program or monthly newsletter
Location: Long Island, NY
Credentials: PhD


Location: Plainview, NY
Credentials: MFT, NCC, PhD
Specialties: Couples/Marital Issues
Other Articles/News by Dr. Karen Sherman:

How To Save Your Relationship This Spring


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In today's world, there's so much to do and so much information to attend to. Clearly, all of this affects the quality of your partnership. And when you add this to the aleady natural flow of relationships where people tend to take each other for granted, and it's likely a couple will start to feel disconnected from one another. As a ... Read more

5 Ways To Reconnect With Your Spouse Before Valentine's Day


February is often considered the love month by many since Valentine's Day is this month. Lots of articles and tips are given out to make sure that those who aren't in a relationship know how to deal with Cupid's Holiday. After all, we are a couple's  society. But're one of the lucky ones. You're part of a twosome. Do ... Read more

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