When you finally decide to go for therapy, here are tips to make sure you find the right person.
I'd like to offer a few suggestions:
1. Do some shopping — at least on the phone. Of all the studies that have been done, in most cases, no particular style of therapy is better than another. What does count is the relationship between the therapist and the client. So you have to like the person you've chosen. This means paying attention to things like if this person feels right to you according to: if their style is to listen a lot vs. get involved, their age and gender, how they plan to help you.
2. If you're going for couple work, is this person a couples therapist? There are very different styles of therapy for helping individuals and couples. Additionally, many individual therapists have a very different perspective regarding the need to keep marriages together. Check this out.
3. Special needs should be addressed. If there are particular problems that you have, you want to ask the person if they've worked in this area. Here are some areas of concern: affairs, addictions and grief work. If the therapist has experience in the area you're concerned with, they will be better able to address it. (By the way, I belong to Marriage Friendly Therapists - a group that believes in doing all they can to keep a marriage together if possible.)
Of course, don’t forget to discuss the "business" of therapy: fees, insurance, cancellation policies, willingness to take emails, etc.
Though this information isn't "sexy," it will allow you to have a successful and satisfying therapeutic relationship leading to a more empowered you!
Wishing you Empowerment,