25 Divorce Lies You Should Never EVER Believe!

By

voices
Let's not make divorce any worse than it has to be.
  1. All divorces are basically the same.
  2. It takes one year to get over your divorce.
  3. It takes one year for every four years you were married to get over your divorce.
  4. Everyone going through divorce has the same emotions in the same order.
  5. The pain of divorce decreases linearly over time.
  6. Once you think you're over your divorce, it never comes up again.
  7. Your family members will always help you as you go through divorce.
  8. It's not OK to feel sorry for yourself.
  9. You'll get over your divorce more quickly if you just avoid thinking about it.
  10. You should be really angry at your ex.
  11. Everyone gets depressed when they go through divorce.
  12. If you haven't been married for very long, you should get over it more quickly than someone who was married for many years.
  13. There's a reason there's no divorce ritual/celebration or marriage funeral — they aren't needed!
  14. The intensity and length of your anger, depression and loneliness are directly proportional to how much you invested in your marriage.
  15. There is something wrong with you if you feel like part of you died when your marriage ended.
  16. Every divorce attorney only has their client's best interests at heart.
  17. You attorney is also going to be able to help you recover from your divorce.
  18. Everyone takes anti-depressants when they get divorced.
  19. Your ex is always the reason your marriage failed.
  20. You should feel really sad when you get divorced.
  21. You don't need any time to adjust to your new single life; you should be able to continue doing everything you were doing before, just fine.
  22. You should start dating right away.
  23. The sooner you get into another relationship, the faster you'll get over your divorce.
  24. Getting divorced means that you are a failure.
  25. Your friends will always support you.

Be honest: how many of lies on this list do you believe? If you're like most people I work with, you probably believe a majority of them. Heck, I believed most of them when I got divorced!

Here's a breakdown of each of the lies and an opportunity for you to choose to believe differently.

All divorces are basically the same. Divorces are all different. Laws vary depending on where you live. Your marriage was not like anyone else's marriage because you and your ex-spouse are two unique individuals. Your divorce will be just as unique. There might be similarities between your divorce and someone else's that you can use to help you with your divorce recovery, but it won't be the same.

More juicy content on YourTango:

Photo: WeHeartIt

Article contributed by

Dr Karen Finn

Divorce Coach

Dr. Karen Finn is a divorce coach and the owner of The Functional Divorce. She works with people through all the different life changes divorce creates so they can get to living the best of their lives.

She is the author of On the Road from Heartbreak to Happiness daily messages to help you help yourself heal from divorce.

Dr. Karen is happy to give you "The 5 Things You MUST Know About Your Divorce". In it you'll get the information you need to be prepared for how your divorce will change your life.

 

 

Location: Ovilla, TX
Credentials: PhD
Other Articles/News by Dr Karen Finn:

Want To Cure Breakup Grief? It's Simple ... Be Happy

By

A breakup can feel like a tornado has come through and wiped from the face of the earth everything you thought your life was. You're walking around in a state of shock trying to make sense of what has happened. And you're just not finding much of anything to rebuild your life upon. The grief can simply be overwhelming. Why is it like this? Why do ... Read more

3 Essential Truths That Will Help You Find Life Balance, FINALLY!

By

I'm turning 50 in just a few days. Honestly, I'm excited about it. This has honestly been the best part of my life because I've finally found balance, and for me balance translates to happiness. But finding it and learning how to hold on to it took me years to figure out. And, I wish it hadn't. So, I'm going to tell you the 3 best life ... Read more

5 Ways To Make Sure Deal Breakers Don't Ruin Your Relationship

By

If you saw someone living inside a tiny cardboard box, you'd probably feel sad, wouldn't you? Or maybe you'd feel sorry for them or even angry that they didn't make better choices about how they lived.  What if I told you that you live trapped in a very small box? How would you feel? I bet you'd deny it and think I was ... Read more

See More

 
Latest Expert Videos
ASK YOURTANGO MORE QUESTIONS
Must-see Videos
SEE MORE VIDEOS
Most Popular