Instead, give it time. When you choose an online dating site or a social scene, stick with it for a while. The same goes for your online dating profile. Give things a month or two and then decide if the profile or site is a keeper or if it's time to change things up and move on. Remember that patience is a virtue.
4. You set unrealistic goals for new dates. You can't possibly know if the next date is going to be the one to father your child or build your dream house with you. Step back and consider whether your expectations are realistic or a sign that you're getting desperate.
Instead, try to set reasonable expectations. You have to have some positive expectations to make the best of a date, but if your expectations run too high, you'll end up anxious or disappointed. Cultivate a beginner's mind and treat each date as an opportunity to have a good time, meet someone new and learn something about them.
5. You feel overwhelmed whenever you think of dating. If you need to take an extra breath because of the tight feeling in your chest or bring your hands to your head as if to stop the muddled thoughts or headache coming on, you're probably overdoing things.
Instead, enjoy the journey. Yes, you're trying to find someone to connect with, but the in the meantime, you get to go to some great restaurants, see that new museum show, and have someone to bike with. Have fun with it.
When dating has become like a part-time job, on top of your regular job, it's time to step back and assess. It could be time for a break, as some of my clients say. But evaluating your approach and changing things up a bit may just give you the optimism and energy to chill out and have a good time.