Now, here are five best practices I recommend women should avoid if you don't want to wreck a good relationship:
1. Lower your fear levels. It may not be evident at the moment, but one of men's strongest desires is to protect and serve the person he loves. When you're afraid, he judges himself as a poor protector. His shame levels go up and he usually gets more irritable and angry. One of the best ways to lower your fear level is to remind yourself that it only takes one committed person to save a relationship.
2. Quit demeaning your man. Most women have no intention of shaming or demeaning their man, but as I noted earlier it often occurs as women become more anxious, frightened and insecure. To demean means to lower in dignity, honor or standing. Just as men are surprised at things that cause women to be afraid, women are often surprised at things that increase men's shame. Here are a few ways that author Pat Love noticed she had shamed the man in her life: excluding him from important decisions, robbing him of the opportunity to help, correcting what he said, questioning his judgment, giving unsolicited advice, ignoring his needs, etc.
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