Out with the Old, and In with the New! If you’re ending a relationship, it is best to stop looking backward over your shoulder (like Lots wife, you may turn to salt!); and instead face forward. Get off the ruminative obsessive maze of churning the same regretful thoughts over in your mind. Face new challenges and experiences. A future orientation makes neurochemical sense: Ending a romantic relationship, brain studies show, is like ending a cocaine addiction! We get depressed from dopamine depletion in an un-tickled withdrawing brain reward system. Dopamine, the master neurochemical, is actually created by exercise, sex (well, you might not be getting that!) and novel and new experiences. So make those happen! Besides, some relationships dead-end in ambiguity, and you have to settle the closure silently from within. Try to cull the learning lessons, and apply them to the next situation, which is surer to win. You’re wiser – not bitter now. Right? So empty your plate and make room for a more spiritually nourishing portion. Let go of clinging, and position yourself for the next anticipated trapeze to swing in !
Warm regards, Eryn Oberlander, M.D. www.droberlander.com firstname.lastname@example.org