to the YourTango newsletter!

Continue to Site »»

ProConnect

Can Marriage Survive In Antarctica?

By . Posted on .

Can Marriage Survive In Antarctica?
Hot Love On The Ice: How do adventuresome couples keep their marriages strong even in Antarctica?

A citizen of the USA can only get there if they are scientists funded by the National Science Foundation; members of the US Air Force who have been assigned there (most all who go to Antarctica volunteer to go); people who volunteer to work there in support roles (cooks, mechanics, etc.); tourists; and those arriving on a ship that are conducting research. The latter category includes us. We are marriage researchers and this is the only way could get to Antarctica to complete our research on successful marriages around the world.

During our expedition to Antarctica, we interviewed a number of married couples (mostly scientists and expedition team members) to ascertain if the long periods of separation and isolation create unique and specific challenges to their marital relationship.

More from YourTango: 12 Signs You're About To Marry A Financial Loser

The good news, of those we interviewed on this expedition, the most important finding is this – their marriages survive and thrive for the most part because they recognize that communication is at the heart of their relationship. Keeping in frequent touch with their spouse during long periods of separation is critical to sustaining their marital relationship.

Relatedly, those traveling on the National Geographic Explorer (the ship we sailed on going and coming from Antarctica) are explorers. Every couple we talked to and/or interviewed, are folks who have traveled the world extensively. They love being together and find that their many journeys can actually strengthen their marital relationship. Moreover, many volunteered to us that these travels kept their marriages vibrant, exciting, and alive.

More from YourTango: 5 Tips To Jerk Your Marriage Out Of A Negative Rut

Secondly, we were interested in seeing if the “Seven Pervasive Characteristics of a Successful Marriage” that we have discovered in our worldwide search for great marriages around the world, apply to people who work in or travel to Antarctica. While we expected to find some differences from the norm, we didn’t. Quite the contrary, our interviews reinforced the notion that great marriages around the world are driven by these common themes:
1. Togetherness: Two become one without losing the individual identities of each other. In successful marriage it is not you and me, it is WE!
2. Truthfulness: Couples talk about anything and everything. In successful marriage there are no sacred cows and no secrets.
3. Respect: Couples understand that you do unto others as you would have them do unto you. Successful love and marriage is about mutual love and respect.
4. Fitness: Successfully married couples understand that taking care of only their only health is not sufficient. They must also promote the health of their spouse. To live until “death do us part” requires a mutual concern about good health.
5. Joint Finances: It is not YOUR money and MY money. In successful marriages, it is OUR money.

Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Dr. Charles & Dr. Elizabeth Schmitz

Author

Dr. Charles D. Schmitz and Dr. Elizabeth Schmitz
America's #1 Love and Marriage Experts
**For marriage advice and hundreds of practical tips, read the Doctors' latest best-selling and multiple-award winning book Building a Love that Lasts (Jossey-Bass/Wiley). Available wherever books are sold. Learn more about America's #1 Love and Marriage Experts.

Location: New York, NY
Credentials: EdD, PhD
Specialties: Couples/Marital Issues, Divorce/Divorce Prevention, Infidelity / Affair Recovery, Marriage, Nutrition, Wellness
Other Articles/News by Dr. Charles & Dr. Elizabeth Schmitz:

12 Signs You're About To Marry A Financial Loser

By

Balancing the family budget requires teamwork and setting common goals. People who are in love support each other through thick and thin—through good and bad financial times. Before you decide that he's the right guy to marry, you need to take a serious look at how he views financial goals, choices, and commitments. Since the number-one cause of ... Read more

5 Tips To Jerk Your Marriage Out Of A Negative Rut

By

With our fast paced society and the extreme demands hitting us from every side, more and more couples find negativity taking over their marriage. An abrupt injection of positivity into your relationship is the only way to change the environment before it is too late. From over 30 years of research in 48 countries with thousands of happily married couples, ... Read more

How To Kill Communication In A Marriage

By

Negative and hurtful statements can have the power to cut through the very fabric of the bond between two people in love. Words can damage and potentially destroy the foundation of your relationship. Make no mistake about it, words matter. While we have learned many lessons over the past 30 years from the thousands of happily married couples we have ... Read more

See More

Recent Expert Posts
Imagine

Change Of Heart: Now She Wants Him Back

There's a reason you broke up with your ex. Is there really any benefit to taking a step backwards?

Smooch

Three Realities you Must Accept in Healthy, Happy Relationship

If you do not understand and accept these realities, then you cannot have a healthy relationship.

Butting Heads

Forgiveness

Most people would agree that forgiving others is a good thing to do but why?

Ask The Experts

Have a dating or relationship question?
Visit Ask YourTango and let our experts and community answer.

Resources
How to find the right pro for you
10 Reasons Mental Health Pros Should Join YourTango Experts

10 Reasons Mental Health Pros Should Join YourTango Experts

YourTango Experts can help your business go from good to great.

10 Steps To Improve Your Coaching Business

Take your coaching business from mediocre to great in no time…

Frequently Asked Questions About YourTango Experts

Thinking of joining? Here's all the facts you need to know to make the most of your membership.

Getting Your Guy To Join You In A Therapy Or Coaching Session

So how can your get your strong, self-reliant, superman to talk to an Expert with you?

Therapist/Counselors: Who We Are & What We Do

What exactly does a therapist/counselor do and can they really help?

See more resources>
HOT STUFF!
FROM OUR PARTNERS