(Originally published on December 27, 2009) Week #5 of the Six Month Sex Challenge--The holidays make me sentimental.
Two and a Half Christmas Stories
Two and a half stories for this blog. Both seem unrelated to my current sex life and, yet, both are integral to what is presently happening.
Story #1 ½
It was our first Christmas together and I was opening the first Christmas present from my husband. Unwrapping the clothing box, my heart sank. The tags on the garments read, “x-small”. I didn’t know how to tell him that I wasn’t an “x-small”, rather a “medium”.
Tentatively I said to him, “I’m not sure this top is going to fit.” Enthusiastically he replied, “I saw a sales lady about your size in the shop and I asked her what size she wore.” I was extremely flattered yet certain we would have to make the pilgrimage to the store to do a size exchange. I went to the bedroom to try on the clothes.
The clothes fit. Not only did they fit, they fit me really well. It had taken me 33 years before I discovered, thanks to my husband, that I am an “x-small” and not a “medium”. I remember wishing I could see my body through his eyes.
Fast forward seven years later to Christmas 2009. Was opening a clothing box from my husband; my heart sank as I saw the garment tag say, “x-small”.
I’m still ten pounds over my normal weight. I appreciate that in a few months I will be back to my usual weight but right now, it’s easier to hide my body behind ugly old sweats and stretchy shirts.
I didn’t know how to tell him that the lovely sweater wouldn’t fit. As I attempted to stick it back in the box he enthusiastically said, “Try it on. Try it on.” Completely depressed, I slumped to the bedroom while envisioning me ripping a few seams as I tried to wriggle the sweater on.
The sweater fit—yes it was tight, but tight in all the right places. Appraising myself in the mirror, I had to admit I looked pretty good. When I showed my husband, he looked like a hungry wolf ready to eat me up.
In that moment, I was taken aback that he saw me as a sexy and sexual woman. Right now, I look in the mirror and all I can see is frump girl—to be fair, it’s because I’m not making any efforts and I am a frump girl.
If only I could always see myself through my husband’s eyes, perhaps I would make more of an effort on my day-to-day appearance and I would feel more sexy and sexual.
Boxing day and we’re at a skating rink trying my two year old’s new skates. There was only one other young couple on the ice. It’s obviously they are a newbie couple as they skate for a bit and then find an excuse to kiss and wrap around each other like pretzels.