4. Go on dates that are exciting, novel and get the adrenaline pumping. Novel experiences can stimulate adrenaline and give you a rush, while exciting dates produce dopamine, the brain chemical of love. Go on a roller coaster at the amusement park, or rock climbing at your gym; take a helicopter ride; try hiking on a high, winding trail or wind-surfing; make a mad dash to catch a sunset at the beach; scream yourselves silly at a football game or at the racetrack. Studies show that people who are emotionally aroused—whether by joy, fear or any other feeling—fall in love more easily. As two love researchers once wrote, "Adrenaline makes the heart grow fonder."
5. See him in his element. Plan a date around skiing, a performance of his rock band, a wine-tasting event or something else he excels at. You will catch sides of him you haven't seen before. His personal power and charisma will be at their height and just may open up a host of juicy feelings.
6. Try turning yourself on first. Go on a date wearing your sexiest lingerie under your clothes. Flirt with him, get touchy-feely, whisper in his ear and maybe kiss him. If he suddenly comes back with some sensual moves, your "chemistry experiment" may prove to be a sparkling success!
Remember that love almost always comes in a surprise package; most people do not end up with the kind of person they imagine for themselves. The woman who dates starving artists marries a rich, balding lawyer. One of my love mentees who was deeply infatuated with a hot George Clooney look-alike (he was married) later created a gem of a marriage with a short plain guy who was her champion and a healing force of nature in her life.
So practice these 6 relationship tips and your love life will make a 180° turn.
Diana Kirschner, Ph.D. is a frequent guest psychologist on The Today Show & the best-selling author of Love in 90 Days (dating advice book), out now in paperback with a new chapter on "Dating Games Men Play." Love in 90 Days was the basis of her PBS Special on love. Connect with Dr. Diana through her FREE relationship & dating advice newsletter.