Love

It's Time To Take Off Your Mask So The Real You Can Find True Love

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It's Time To Take Off Your Mask So The REAL You Can Find True Love

You really want to find that special, true love. Deep, passionate, connected, forever love. Why does it seem so impossible to find these days? Don’t get discouraged, darling. It is possible to learn how to find love.

Here’s the secret: you must be authentic. Authenticity is defined as being real or genuine, showing up as the completely unique and divine individual that you are. Just like your fingerprint, there is no one in the world exactly like you.

Unfortunately, too often we let feelings of shame take over rather than celebrate our unique differences. We strive to create "sameness" so we can fit in, be accepted and ultimately connect. We adjust, change and shrink our authentic selves, putting on masks to hide our true selves behind.

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What happens? You connect. However, it isn't the strong, sustainable and meaningful connection your heart and soul is craving, because it isn't created from a genuine, authentic place. The masks you create in order to be accepted only create barriers to what you really want.

Have you ever noticed that when you are first dating someone, you start acting differently? Liking new things, taking up new hobbies? Don’t get me wrong here, expansion and new experiences are wonderful things, and if meeting someone is expanding your authentic, divinely created, beautiful self — great, go for it!

But too often we try to change ourselves or hide parts of who we really are to gain acceptance or to fit into someone else’s life. Our deep desire to create a loving connection makes us morph into someone other than our authentic self.

You might be afraid that if you don't like the same things as the person you are dating, or if you show up as who you really are, you will be rejected. What could possibly be more painful than being truly vulnerable, sharing your complete and unique self with someone and being rejected, right?

How about fitting into another person’s life so nicely that you develop a long term relationship, possibly even get married and have kids and then a few years down the road feel exhausted, bored and completely confined, living in the box you have created for yourself trying to be someone who is not really you?

Consider the pain that comes from this kind of relationship failure, lack of connection and living unhappily ever after. Shifting from trying to fit into everyone else’s world to embracing authenticity can be difficult, and often comes as the result of an imbalance or lock in your solar plexus chakra.

We are energetic beings. From the very first religious writings, the Vedic religion comes the belief that human beings have seven energy centers — the chakras that are vertically aligned starting at the base of the spine and extending to the top of the head.

If you prefer to look at this from a scientific perspective, quantum physics teaches us that we are all made up of energy, and we are all connected through this energy. Often, experiences in life cause us to shut down to protect ourselves. When we do this, we create locks in our energy centers, or chakras. These locks prevent us from attracting and keeping the true love we desire.

When you feel unempowered, struggle from low self-esteem or fear of looking foolish if you show up as your authentic self, it indicates a lock in your third energy center, the solar plexus chakra.

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If this resonates with you, you might benefit from balancing your solar plexus chakra. You can become more authentic and shine brighter by doing these 4 things now.

1. Spend some time in the sun.

Your solar plexus is yellow in color, just like the sun. The light from the sun can actually activate balancing of this chakra. Put on your sunscreen, sit outside and absorb 15 minutes of sunshine whenever you can.

2. Let go of feelings of shame. 

Ask yourself what you feel most ashamed of. Write this on a piece of paper, and then burn it in a safe place. This will help you let go of any feelings of shame and transmute the energy from shame to love.

3. Memorize and use these daily affirmations.

I am powerful.

I trust my own guidance.

I am authentic.

I am a powerful creator of my life.

I am using my power to make a positive difference.

4. Heal your gut. 

Issues with the digestive tract, liver or adrenals are signs that your solar plexus is unbalanced. Imbalance in our emotional/spiritual realms creates imbalance in our physical bodies.

Spending time focused on healing the physical impacts is a smart idea. Your naturopath or nutritionist can help but start today by eating more vegetables and much less gluten and dairy.

By unlocking your solar plexus chakra you will be able to be authentic in all areas of your life, especially love. When you feel safe and confident showing up as the real you, the right person will be attracted to you — and you will create the epic love you truly desire.

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Diane Taylor is a relationship coach with a passion for helping people discover what's holding them back from finding and keeping the love they desire.