It's A Choice: Don't Be A Drama Queen


It's A Choice: Don't Be A Drama Queen

Do you know those people? The folks who seem like something is always happening to them?  It’s an endless parade of always being busy, flat tires, broken hearts, ecstatic love affairs (that then crash and burn into tragic moments)? Their life is all about the drama, baby.To be honest, darling, some of those people stare right back at is in the mirror (yikes!)  I admit it: after my divorce, I thrived on drama and made friends with fellow drama queens.

People choose drama because it comes from a belief that drama will equal attention. It's also an adrenalin rush. When someone lives in constant drama, they believe they are the victims of circumstance. Nothing is “their fault,” and they are constantly seeking – even begging – to be rescued. Drama is also an addiction that becomes the lifeblood of everyday living.

When my partner and I moved in together in 2010, I unknowingly began a Drama Detox. I woke up each morning feeling loved and cherished. When I went into the kitchen to make coffee, there wasn’t a teary-eyed girlfriend bemoaning lost love, there was peace and quiet laughter. I learned to nourish my mind and my soul with the simple art of living.

Don’t get me wrong, the sudden switch to a peaceful existence was scary as hell and I was afraid I woulc become boring. The only time my heart raced was when we made love.

What I learned was that I could create a daily life that felt nourishing and supportive through kinder treatment of myself and the simple fact: things don’t have to be complicated. As part of my detox, I ended relationships that were filled with drama. Because when we spend our time with Drama Queens and Kings, the lifestyle is going to rub off on us.

Pure and simple, drama distracts you from creating the life of your dreams. The rush of drama may make you feel like you're living, but in truth, darling, it's crippling  you.

The mere act of living means that challenges will be inevitable. There will also be people who want to drag us into their issues, loved ones will die, and work will be stressful. But you can choose simply navigate these challenging moments with grace. No drama necessary. If this reformed Drama Queen can do it, then, darling, I have faith that you, too, can create a life you love. Drama Free.

Not sure where to begin? Let me share my best tools and tricks. My upcoming group coaching circle, Make Your Inner Sex Kitten Roar begins April 27, 2014.

Debra Smouse is a Tarnished Southern Belle who ditched drama in 2010. Visit her website or connect with her on Twitter or Facebook.

This article was originally published at . Reprinted with permission from the author.
Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Debra Smouse

Life Coach

You deserve to live a daily life you adore. When you listen to your heart, you can purposefully choose actions to move you towards how you want to feel.

Tarnished Southern Belle (and life coach) Debra Smouse can help you de-tangle the drama in your life, push away the need for perfection, and show you how to create a daily life that you love.

Want to get help taking that first step in creating meaningful goals? Get crystal clear with my free e-Book Listen to Your Heart: Design a Daily Life You Adore.

Location: Dayton, OH
Credentials: BS
Other Articles/News by Debra Smouse:

13 Signs You May Need Marriage Counseling


We believe we're getting the fairy tale when we get married. You know: meet "the one," have a whirlwind courtship, get married and live happily ever after. What the fairy tales don't tell you is that relationships take work. Often times, we don't go into a relationship with the tools to manage the challenges, which is where the pros ... Read more

Take A Leap of Faith


Imagine that you are Jane. You live in the jungle and life is nice. You have a lovely tree house and you love Tarzan. Yet you know that you want more. Let’s face it: living in the tree, while safe and fun can honestly be a little boring. Your heart tells you that you can explore, learn and embrace the beautiful life around you. Muster up your courage, ... Read more

Don't Pursue Happiness: Choose To Be Happy Now


I'm going to share a secret to happiness that most folks wouldn't want me to divulge, so listen close. The secret to becoming enchanted with my life is finding a deep love for what my current reality is. Here's the deal, kitten: when we choose to focus on what we don’t have, we are living in a state of constant reaching and searching and ... Read more

See More


Sign up for our daily email and get the stories everyone is talking about.

Ask The Experts

Have a dating or relationship question?
Visit Ask YourTango and let our experts and community answer.