If you have been single for months, or even years, you probably feel like your search for love has been way too long. During the dating process your emotions may range between hope and despair. There is a point where most singles reach when nothing they have done has translated into something tangible – a life partner.
You know your issues inside and out, you stopped dating the jerks but now you just can’t seem to meet anyone that you click with or even get fresh dates at all. You are at that in-between stage and you feel there is nothing more to do (or that you want to do) to make a difference in your fate. If this is you, you may have reached a “dating plateau.”’
In this time of limbo, you have two choices. The first choice is to remain in the plateau and complain about the outside forces working against you to keep you single. You may feel powerless because you think you have no other options but to wait and whine.
The second choice is to use this as an opportunity to break free by continuing to push through and finally attract the love you deserve. The good news about a plateau is that it is the point in time just before meet your ideal partner. You have done all the foundation work and you are not going back to your old ways. There is no looking back anymore (been there, done that), now you are building a new reality for yourself.
The longer you stay in the plateau, however, the longer it takes for your partner to appear. So, you must find a way to break through to the next level. Here are some ways to get out of your dating rut and finally attract your ideal partner:
1. Program Your Mind. Create a habit of joyful anticipation by programming your inner mind for success. Listen twice a day to positive suggestions about attracting your ideal partner. Imagine being in love and flood your mind and emotions with the possibility. You get what you focus on, so using audios or daily visualization can keep your mind focused on what you want v. what you don’t want. Try new meditations to bring fresh ideas to your habitual thinking.
2. Take Powerful Action. Break out of the current pattern by just doing something different. Even if you just switch online dating sites or go to a new social event, get out of your current habits so you can see different results.
3. Clear Your Little Black Book. Stop dating the old, familiar friends with benefits or the ex-lover that keeps you occupied until the one appears. Make a clean break from the past to create a new future.
4. Be Open to a New Type. You don’t have to settle for someone you are not attracted to. Your old type wasn’t working so well for you, so maybe it is about time to give the short guy or curvy gal a chance. Date a little older than you are used to and allow some room in your “approved-to-date” window to see that what is best for you is in a different package than you expected.
5. Hire a coach. Just like you look in the mirror before you go out to see how you look from the outside, a coach shows you what you can’t see on the inside. Your habitual mind is very clever and sounds really reasonable with excuses, but its real goal is to keep you single. Having a coach can help you cut through the B.S. that your mind is feeding you and show you blind spots that are sidetracking your efforts. You will bypass your dating plateau much faster and attract the love you deserve if you are open to feedback and looking at yourself and dating with a fresh perspective.
6. Honestly look at your career. Some people wait until they get their relationship life figured out before they make a change in business. Forget about the knight with the white horse coming to rescue you, find something that fuels your passion right now. If you hate your job, you hate your life. A life partner isn’t going to change that. By doing the work you love, you attract a match with that same fulfilled state of mind.
The most important tip of all is to never stop growing. If you are tired of self-discovery then you are not approaching the process in the right way. I don’t know how many times a day I hear,“I am so sick of working on myself." I hate to break it to you but self-awareness is a lifelong process, not a tool to get something and then you are “done.”
Let go of the need to fix and, instead, open up to knowing yourself in all ways. You have the key inside of you that leads you on the path of true love. If you keep searching for the key, you will unlock more than just the door to amazing love, but a new, fulfilling life.
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