Are you playing with the law of attraction and dating, getting frustrated with all the rules? Isn’t it strange how you hear advice from different teachers and they seem to contradict each other? I dove into the personal development to find the secret to love and found myself spinning from one teaching to another, getting confused as to what was the right path to follow. Throughout my twenty years of self-discovery, I finally realized that out of all I learned that following just ONE RULE is the key that never fails and always makes me empowered.
Most of you know that your thoughts create your life. You are the creator (or co-creator with God) of your life experience. The law of attraction states what you think you become. However, many people abandon this law when things take too long or they aren’t seeing the results they want such as finding their true love. They start to live by another rule when they make up excuses as to why they haven’t met their dream guy yet, believing that external circumstances are more powerful than themselves.
More from YourTango: Pop Your Comfort Bubble & Open Up To Love
Oh, I’ve been there. I was doing all my inner work, knowing the one rule, but then I would fall back to the thoughts that I was in the wrong place, too old, too successful, not pretty enough, not thin enough or interesting enough. After proper self-abuse, I would exclaim that men are the problem and they just don’t want a commitment. I start beating myself up for not learning self-love earlier when I had a chance and when men were in the marrying age. I was in my late thirties and felt like love was next to impossible at this point. Yes, can you believe all that noise?
What happens when you go down that road in your mind is that you take yourself away from the center of power. You move from the One Rule that you are the creator to the bystander, succumbing to fate. You can attract what you want, but you add on top of that idea that randomly the divine intervenes and decides for you once in a while. When you play by the second rule, you no longer have power over your life and start making excuses like “everything happens for a reason.”
More from YourTango: The Real Reason You Haven't Found Your Perfect Partner
The most powerful thing you can do is to take responsibility for everything that happens to you in the process of attracting your guy. If you aren’t getting dates, find out why you are creating that. If you are meeting unavailable men, why are you attracting them? If the last guy you dated was a big jerk, why were you attracted to him in the first place? This process isn’t about beating yourself up, but rather say, “Oh, look at the results I am getting, let me see how I can shift inside to get a different result.”
The results you get in dating are in exact proportion to your beliefs whether they are conscious or subconscious. There are many ways to uncover why you are creating your perpetual single life. One thing you can do today is just ask yourself the question. Take a piece of paper out and write down, “I am not having any dates right now because…” and write whatever comes to your mind. At first, you will get all those crazy powerless excuses (men are jerks will probably show up), but then your inner wisdom will reveal the real issue that is stopping you. You cannot heal what you are not aware of, so doing this uncovering work can give you the insight you need to finally have a breakthrough in your love life.