Ever have a false positive in dating?


Ever have a false positive in dating?
You thought you found the one, but then he wasn't...
  • Practice Compassionate Rejection. If you feel intense guilt for rejecting someone that makes you lose sleep or puts you in an emotional downslide, you probably also have intense reactions when someone rejects you. As you become aware that you aren’t rejecting him because you are mean or want to hurt him, but that there is simply not a connection, you can have compassion for yourself and the person you date when you are the one getting the bump.


Lastly, love the dating process. If you hate to date, you will not have very good results. You will have a poor attitude and everyone you meet will feel it. The men/women you interact with will sense that you are just looking to seal the deal and feel like a pair of shoes on a discount rank. Enjoy meeting new people and learning about them. Even if there is no attraction, you can find something interesting about anyone. Use dating as a practice for being detached from results, staying in your power, keeping your boundaries and expressing your best self. As you love the process, the process will love you back.

This article was originally published at . Reprinted with permission from the author.
Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Debi Berndt


Debi Berndt is the co-founder of CreativeLove.com, a personal development system for singles to stop fixing themselves and finally find true love. She works with her partner, Dr. Robert Maldonado (Psychologist). Their system was developed based on Carl Jung's work and influenced by Eastern Philosophy.  Debi is also the author of the bestselling book, LET LOVE IN. Get your free lecture and meditation - Why you are single and how to find love without fixing yourself here.

Location: Santa Monica, CA
Credentials: CHT
Other Articles/News by Debi Berndt:

Always Getting Rejected? 3 Ways To Love Yourself Anyway


You hear people tell you, "you have to love yourself first," before someone will love you. This common self-help quote didn't help me much. I tried to love myself. I took confidence workshops and I said my affirmations, but when someone I liked stopped calling, my positive thoughts turned into self-hate again. I thought, "What is wrong with ... Read more

Pop Your Comfort Bubble & Open Up To Love


Are you afraid of being alone and single? Do you wonder if the search for true love will ever be over? Do you obsess over the idea, "what if I never meet anyone?" Most singles say being alone scares them and they fear never meeting that special person. The unconscious mind, however, is always moving you away from what you fear and trying to keep you ... Read more

The Real Reason You Haven't Found Your Perfect Partner


Do you keep attracting the non-committal man or woman? You can see a pattern, but feel like the cause is outside of you. You blame your love problems on Match.com or the city that you live in or the men or women your age, but the reason you don't have your true partner isn't about any of those things. The answer for your loneliness is unconscious and, ... Read more

See More


Sign up for our daily email and get the stories everyone is talking about.

Ask The Experts

Have a dating or relationship question?
Visit Ask YourTango and let our experts and community answer.