I got this amazing email the other day. The moment I read it I wanted to give her a virtual hug as quickly as possible. Here’s what she said…
I'm a 60-year-old widow, and I haven't been in the dating arena for over 30 years. I can't begin to tell you all the things I need to know, because the whole thing itself is foreign to me. My goal is to gain the confidence to take the first step, and put myself out there, and hopefully take a second step, and a third step.
I'm too young to spend the rest of my life alone. I want to be unstoppable in my pursuit to find a fun, and fulfilling, loving relationship with a quality guy. I look forward to learning from you. Yes please, I'm ready for the challenge.
I love this. What I love about her is the grasp on reality she has. She knows there’s a first step, a second step, and a third step. So many people are looking for a magic pill. They want to go from knowing nothing to being in a loving relationship within 24 hours. They want to go from zero to sixty as quickly as possible.
The key here for Joyce, is to have the confidence to take the first step. The first step is always the hardest.
The first step is about smiling at men, making yourself available, flirting, getting comfortable in your own skin, and opening your heart to men. The first step is about not taking rejection personally because it means absolutely nothing. Just get your feet wet. Go on a date or two. See what men are all about. Have no expectations. Just be very present in the moment.
The second step is to define what you really want in a relationship again After you go out and meet some men, start to think about what you need in a man. What are you looking for? Be clear about what you want. Be certain the kind of man you want to be with. It’s hard to attract the right kind of men when you don’t know what you actually want.
What about the third step?
Well, once you date a little, and you have a good idea of what you want, you’ll start to learn how to communicate it better. Right now, you’re like a little girl in a sweet shop. It’s all strange and exciting. You’re learning what it feels like to be a single woman again. It’s a beautiful process Joyce, it really is.
Lots of us need to go through this process, but many of us aren’t brave enough to start. What everybody can learn from what Joyce is going through is that it’s all about taking one-step at a time. That’s what life is all about. You have to crawl before you can walk. You have to walk before you can run. That’s all Joyce is doing here. She’s crawling, but it won’t be long before she’s walking and then running.
I’m proud of people like Joyce. Some people reach her age and decide it’s time to give up. She knows there’s still so much life left to live. There’s so much love left to share, and so many beautiful relationships on the horizon for you. I want Joyce to inspire you today. Just take one-step at a time. But make sure you take that all important first step.