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5 Ways To Avoid Sabotaging A First Date

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5 Ways To Avoid Sabotaging A First Date [EXPERT]
Logging in to emails after a first date could put you out of a second one.
Why "checking in" online after a first date may be "checking you out" of a potential second date.

3. Worry When There's Cause To Worry

If you've been dating someone you met online for a couple of weeks and they are still logging into their Yahoo! Personals account, then I would start to get a little worried — but not for the reason you think.

More from YourTango: How to Deal with Creepy Guys

Think about this. Let's say you are dating them believing you are dating each other exclusively. They are still logging into their account,and you are still checking to see whether or not they are still logging into their account. You deep down don't trust them. Online dating is a lot of fun but the problem is that it can sometimes create a bit of paranoia. In this situation, you can do what I describe below in number four. 


4. Have The Conversation

So let's say you encounter the situation where you've been dating someone you met online for a couple weeks and you are worried about the fact that they are still logging into their Yahoo! Personals account. Don't let paranoia and speculation overtake you; address it directly and have a conversation about it with the other person. Ask them if they're still dating other people. They might want to take it a little slower than you do or they may not feel the same way that you do. No matter what they say, it's always good to have open lines of communication between the two of you because doing so always breeds a healthier relationship from the get-go. Plus, then you don't have to "wonder" what they're doing online.   


5. Understand How Men Are Wired

Many men tend to look online even during the first month they're dating someone because men are always looking. The fact that they do this doesn't mean that they're not into you,  it just means they might be comparing you to other women or they might just be going through the process of deciding.

It's funny. A client I worked with recently told me that even after he met his now wife on Yahoo! Personals, that he was still logging into his account and emailing with other women up until a couple of months before he proposed. Men will always keep their options open and some women do the same thing. The man you've met may not be 100% sure about you quite yet. So, have the confidence that if things are going well between the two of you that he is interested even if he is still logging into his online account. 

Now if this goes on for three or four months, then I can see that there may be a major problem. In the first thirty days, though, remember that the two of you are still so new to each other;don't evaluate too quickly if he is still logging into his online account.  

More from YourTango: Why You SHOULDN'T Get Married...Until You're 40

 

These are some tips and guidelines to help you make your online dating experience as great as possible and to give the best possible chance for things to work with a man you meet online. By doing a little less "checking in" on things and a lot more trusting, you will not sabotage a potentially great relationship.  

Article contributed by
Advanced Member

David Wygant

Dating Coach

Looking forward to speaking with you!

David

www.davidwygant.com

Location: Marina Del Rey, CA
Credentials: Other
Other Articles/News by David Wygant:

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