The rollercoaster prevailed. I was tired now ... far too tired and it was time I stopped chasing, racing, running and fixing. Finally, I looked within. Do you know what I found? A wonderful, loving, kind, smart, scared, broken, misguided, ashamed, angry, desperate for love woman, who had been looking for love in all the wrong places.
It was time I learned how to love myself. It was time I healed my broken little girl by making peace with her past, forgiving her parents, setting stronger boundaries and begin to treat her with dignity, respect, and gentleness.
It was time I integrated all the fragmented parts of my personality: the perfect mother and wife, the party girl, the self-righteous nun, the binge eater, the vegetarian, the wounded teenager, the bookworm, the broken child, the ugly geek, the best friend, the fitness expert, the focused and determined business woman, the sexy seductress, the loving caretaker, the intelligent philosopher, the homemaker, the nutritionist, the sinner and the saint.
I realized I couldn't like some parts of me, while rejecting the rest. I had to learn to love and accept me. I had to learn to forgive me. I had to ask my children to forgive me for leaving their father and for anything else I had ever done to hurt them. I had to ask my ex-husband to forgive me for leaving him. I had to clean up any of unfinished business that was weighing me down and keeping me stuck.
I had to let go of my shame, guilt, fear and blame. I had to surrender my need to please, impress, and outdo everyone, especially myself.
I had to learn to love me, in spite of myself. I had to learn to love my fat, faults, mania, depression, wrinkles and my mistakes, so that I could stop exerting so much energy into hiding them. 5 Steps To Self-Love & Happiness [EXPERT]
It was time to shine light on all my great qualities, without being afraid someone would discover my bad ones. It was time I stepped into integrity, forgave myself for the ways I had let myself down, and made the decision that my past didn't predict my future any more than the bumps and valleys behind my car influenced the road ahead of me.
It was time I got on the right path for me. It was time I started listening and loving myself. It was time I started taking care of me.
Living with self-love isn't about forgetting about those you love. It isn't about having abs of steel, a monstrous bank account or hundreds of friends and admirers. Although, these things might happen once you do love yourself. Self-love is about living in alignment with who you really are: a divine, special, holy child of God who is pure, passionate, trusting, willing, loving, forgiving, courageous, and joyous.