By the time I turned 25, I was married with two precious daughters of my own. Based on my past, I had decided that the needs of my family came before my own. I decided that the needs of the "unit" had to come before the needs of any one person within that unit.
For a few years, I was happier than I had ever been. I had more love in one day from my children than any amount of love I had ever received over the course of my life. Nevertheless, my weight continued to climb and I had found myself sometimes crying for no reason.
I couldn't understand why with a husband, two great kids and a beautiful home on the water, I couldn't sustain my happiness. I watched late night television shows, once the kids were sleeping, and hot fudge sundaes gave me far more pleasure than sex. I hated my clothes, or maybe I hated my body in my clothes. I didn't want anyone to see me from "before," when I was thin and beautiful.
I was up, down, happy and sad. I had convinced myself that if I lost weight, renovated the kitchen, got a new engagement ring and purchased the latest model minivan, I would surely find and maintain my happiness ... but it never happened. Empowered Women: Unite Under Self-Love
I lost the weight, renovated, got a new huge diamond and a top of the line minivan. But, they all only sustained my joy for a period of time. Eventually, I would find myself staring off into space wondering, "what's next?"
Finally, in my thirties, after leaving my husband, walking away from all my material possessions and setting out to prove to the world that I was smart, successful, and loveable, I self-published my first book. I was certain extreme happiness would soon find me.