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If You Want It, Go Out And GET IT, Plain and Simple

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Love, Self

It takes work, but it's worth it.

What would you like to do with your life if you were guaranteed not to fail? What changes in your life would you make if you were fully confident you could change them? What great ideas have you come up with that you’ve immediately talked yourself out of by coming up with all reasons why they won’t work? What dreams do you have that are unrealized because you believe they won’t come true?

Your dreams and desires are a part of who you are. They give your life purpose and meaning. You owe it to yourself and to the world at large to develop your talents and realize your full potential. You really can have it all. But in order to get it, you’re going to have to break through all that gets in your way. Here are some common barriers that get in the way and how to overcome them.

Stop believing you can’t

Can’t is foulest four letter word there is. And it’s a C word. Whenever you think you can’t do something, I challenge you to prove it. Prove you can’t do it. In order to prove it, you have to do absolutely everything possible in an attempt to make it happen. Let’s say you’d like to return to school but what holds you back if believing you’re not smart enough. To prove that, you have to register for classes, always show up for all your classes, actively participate, do all of the work assigned to you and spend hours studying. You must do all of this with full on effort. Be aware of that part of you that believes you’re not smart enough as it will cause you to resist going all out to make this happen. If you honestly put in the effort and at the end of your first semester and you’re failing, maybe you could say you’re just not smart enough. Even then I’d recommend you get tested for a learning disorder and continue to search for ways to succeed.

Believe in what is possible.

Making change is hard work, but the effort you put forth will ultimately pay off. Don’t get discouraged when the going gets tough. When setbacks occur and things don’t work as planned, don’t give up. Continue to believe that what you’re after is possible and live in that possibility. Your road to success will not be easy, but it will always be possible so long as you believe it to be.

Ask for help

Many fail to succeed because of their inability to ask for help. Asking for help can be uncomfortable. Perhaps you feel you don’t want to be a bother. The reality is most people are happy to help. After all, how do you feel when someone asks you for help? There are plenty of people who are willing and able to help you with your needs. Get help from a tutor, a trainer, a coach, a mentor, a support group, a friend or partner. There are plenty of people that can help you get what you want. You just need to ask. If you encounter no, it just means no for that one person and it doesn’t mean everybody will say no.  

Ignore your critics

You may encounter naysayers. People closest to you may also try to talk you out of your endeavor. They say things like “My God, do you realize how much work that with entail? Do you know what you’re getting yourself into? People say these things because they’re filtering this through their own belief of what is possible for them. If they believe they could do it, they certainly would believe you could too. Stick to what you believe is possible for you and don’t allow their influence to bring you down.

Don’t be afraid to fail

Some of life’s lessons can be learned from the school of hard knocks. I love what the late Randy Pausch said “Experience is what you get when you don’t get what you want.” Learn from your experience. Fear of failure is most potent right before we are about to do something great. In spite of the fear, do it anyway. What’s the worst that could happen? By doing this you’ll learn that what you actually fear the most never happens. The only sure fire way to annihilate fear is to do the thing you fear.

Embrace change

It was Henry Ford who said “If you always do what you’ve always done, you’ll always get what you’ve always got.” The amount of change you want in your life is proportionate to the change you will need to make. That begins with changing who you are and how you respond to the circumstances of your life. It could even mean changing who you associate with and changing your environment. Get out of your comfort zone.  

You experience life as you expect to find it. Don't get stuck in thinking "We'll, I guess it just wasn't meant to be." According to who? Life just doesn't happen to you. You create it. So what are you waiting for? Get on with it.

Craig Nielson serves as a Professional Coach, Speaker and Educator helping women who feel insecure with self-doubt to becoming fully empowered with self-confidence. Learn more and get a free consultation and e-book at www.myinternalimage.com

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