It’s funny how two people can have the same circumstances, and have two totally different ways of dealing with them. It all starts with how we think.
For one person, let’s call her Betsy, she looks at life through a ‘yes, but’ lens. She tries to be positive but all she can see are problems, challenges and obstacles to get past. When something happens in her life, her brain automatically goes to, “Oh no! What will I do? I can’t believe this happened to me! Again!”
Betsy has trained her brain to go right to the problem. And stay there. To focus on the negative. A lot of the time, Betsy feels helpless. Like life just happens to her, and she has no say in the matter.
Now let’s talk with Betsy’s friend, Lisa. Lisa’s mind goes in the opposite direction.
When something happens in Lisa’s life, her mind goes automatically to two main thoughts: One is ‘I’ve got this!’ and the other is ‘I’ll figure it out’.
Can you imagine which friend feels better on a daily basis?
Our brain has pathways between neurons, and the pathways most frequently used become like superhighways. Our thoughts crop up in response to situations so fast we don’t even realize we’re making a choice about what to think.
If we’re used to being a problem solver, and automatically start looking for solutions to whatever life gives us, our mind will go to ‘I’ve got this!’
If we’re used to focusing on the negatives in life, and feeling like we’re not in charge, our mind will go to ‘Darn, why me?’
Try it on.
- I’ve got this vs. Why me?
- Which one makes you feel more powerful?
- Which one makes you feel more in charge?
- Which one do you choose?
I don’t know about you, but ‘I’ve got this’ is my new favorite response to almost everything. And ‘I’ll figure it out’ is my number two favorite.