When I do readings with men who wish that they could get a little more action from their mates in the bedroom, some kiddingly say, “Isn’t there a viagra for women?”
And ladies, you don’t get off so easy. Statistics show that up to 85% of married women are dis-satisfied with their sex lives. How easy it is to throw blame at your partner for your unmet physical needs. What is going on?
Sure, you pore over Oprah and Cosmo searching for how to express your needs, but let me ask a question. Do you know what your partner needs? Are you so busy trying to explain your point of view and get frustrated when your partner tunes you out? Yikes! Then we wonder why our relationships aren’t perfect like they are in the movies.
In the Heart Dynamix™ module of the Master Intuitive Coach® Institute training, I dig deep into this and many other relationship issues. There is nothing that breaks up old resistance and uncovers the Goblin, that wounded part of the ego faster than relationship drama.
There is nothing that cuts to the quick like betrayal. And NO relationship is immune to betrayal. The closer you allow another person to get to you, the more likely it is that your deepest wound will be exposed. I know this sucks but it is the way to freedom. Your Goblin only wants to protect you and as long as it controls the buried memories of your childhood drama and trauma, it wins.
So what’s is a lonely, unfulfilled soulmate to do? If you are looking for the aphrodisiac that will turn the heat back on in your relationship, you won’t find it in your medicine cabinet. If you want your mate to melt in your presence...there is one sure cure. Empathy.
In part 1 and part 2 of this special series on communication, I share the miraculous Intentional Dialogue Process championed by Dr. Harville Hendrix. Why miraculous? If this formerly hard headed and hard hearted gypsy vixen can be transformed to a compassionate and loving communicator and mate...that IS a miracle, a miracle I know Marc is grateful for every day.
When you understand true empathy, instead of seeing your version of your mate’s reality and thus making the conflict all about you, Dr. Hendrix’s process teaches you exactly how to see and feel your partners experience. In order to seal the deal and mix the magic that will light up your partner’s eyes again, the three steps of Mirroring, Validating and now Empathy are just what the doctor ordered.
If empathy is out of reach for you because your partner has screwed up one too many times I have a secret for you. There is a little work you need to do first. Remember, when your partner messes up, your Goblin springs into action. Defensiveness, blaming and shaming flood your mind and the doors of your heart swing shut.
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