Over 50 and looking for love? You have company! Try these 6 tips to make finding a date easier.
Did you know that interest in dating after 50 has never been so hot? There's a good reason for this. According to the Chicago Tribune, in 1990, only 1 in 10 divorces were couples over 50, but today the number has risen to 1 in 4! That's a 250 percent jump and explains the buzz-ability around dating for the 50+ crowd.
The fact is, so many more people in midlife are dating in 2014 and looking for love. So, if you've counted many summers and are single, that's really good news. The stigma attached to being divorced or dating in midlife is no longer an issue—it's virtually gone. Freedom from feeling shame has opened the doors to seeking romance, as 50+ singles explore options and enjoy dating with a new sense of adventure. The trend today is everyone's doing it.
Surprisingly, online dating is the most popular way for singles over 50 to meet. For the midlife single gal, this is especially good news since more men are online than women: 52% vs. 46%. Not only that, but this is the fastest growing segment of the U. S. population relying on digital dating to find love.
As a dating coach for women over 50, I also know there is a tremendous amount of frustration and sometimes fear of looking for love online. Allow me to diminish your frustrations and calm your fears with these easy and surefire tips. Continue reading to see my 6 online dating tips for singles over 50.
- Everyone has baggage. Yes, people will have baggage whether you meet them online or elsewhere, so be wise and expect it. Think about what you will accept and deal with and what just won't work for you in a relationship. Some common issues are having young kids, health concerns, different ideas about retirement and troubled relationships with the ex.
- Judge each person as an individual. Baggage also includes life experience and the negative attitudes that come with them. For example, if you got divorced because of infidelity, you may think all men are cheaters and liars. But this is simply not the case. There are plenty of loyal men out there who would love to be in a relationship with a great woman like you. Get to know each man as an individual and don't lump the entire gender together as a result of your past experience.
- Try new things. It's been said you can't teach an old dog new tricks, but age is a state of mind and you're not old! (They say 50 is the new 30 right?) Be open to trying new things like online dating. You might also join a MeetUp.com group, go to a singles dance, check out a beer tasting, or attend a car show. Since dating is a numbers game, you'll need to expand your world and do things you've never done before to cross paths with other singles looking for love.
- Think of dating as an adventure. You may need to push yourself to rekindle your "friendly skills" if you haven't had to interact with new people in a while. This may seem daunting, but, it can also be a lot of fun! Think of these dating activities as a new adventure and let it bring excitement into your life. Shaking things up helps you feel that youthful exuberance again.
- Love can't be rushed. Just because you are getting older doesn't mean you can rush love. Dating after 50, sometimes feel like they are up against a deadline, and want to find a partner to grow old with as quickly as possible. It takes time to get to know someone and discover your level of compatibility. You would think that by the time you've reached your 50s, you'd know more about yourself and what you want. That might be very true for you but the trouble is, that doesn't always hold true for others. So, you might encounter people who are confused about what they want in a partner or if they rather not get serious. There is only one way to know and that takes time and patience, which is the same at any age.
- Follow traditional dating roles. It may seem like everything has changed regarding how dating works, but don't be fooled by what you see in the media. If you are looking for lasting love, you can never go wrong by following traditional gender roles for dating.
I often use the example of ballroom dancing in which there is only one leader and one follower. This applies to just the initial dating phase, the first 4-8 dates and after that, things tend to balance out once in relationship. For you single gals over 50, it still works best to let the man pursue you. You'll have a lot less confusion and stress and an easier time finding the right partner if you follow this proven dating advice.
I'm not a fan of women asking men out. However, you can certainly be friendly, flirty and strike up a conversation in person or online. Encourage men by showing your appreciation for a date with one compliment, saying thank you or letting a guy know you had a great time.
Some of my dating coaching clients feel they must ask a man out who has flirted with them, but not gone to the next level himself. If this happens to you and you feel driven to take this opportunity, don't ask him out more than once. After that, be smart and step back to see if he decides to pursue you on his own. That's the only way you'll know if he's genuininely interested. However, my best dating advice is to never chase men and I stand by that statement no matter the reason. Most often, it doesn't work out no matter what you've seen on TV or in the movies.
Now that dating over 50 is so acceptable, stop waiting around and get out there. People of all ages fall in love every day. You could be next if you start dating now.
Are you a woman over 50 struggling to find love? As a dating coach for women 40+, I provide proven dating methods that have helped thousands. Get more tips in my FREE book 5 Big Turnoffs That Drive Men Away. Let me help you find love with the right man and avoid the many potential pitfalls along the way.
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