As summer winds down and the air turns a little chillier, our routines change, too. We find ourselves cozying into the back-to-school and back-to-work mode. There is a sense that we have an infinite amount of time to get things done before the November and December holidays — with time allowed for autumnal activities like apple picking and pumpkin carving. But be honest: is "finding love" high in your priority list? Is it even on the list at all?
The summer was fun with vacations and long weekends but if it didn't bring you a partnership, you may have gotten discouraged. You may have been putting off doing the work required to meet dates and a long term relationship or even marriage. But you should consider putting the effort in: wouldn't it be nice to find someone special in your life for the holidays this year and beyond?
Now it's time to get serious and make a commitment to start dating and getting yourself out there again. I recommend you create a dating plan to find someone special. My clients follow three steps to meet new people and have great success in finding love. Create your own dating plan with these simple steps and see who comes your way.
1. Go Back Online!
You've tried it before. Yes, I know it can be frustrating and tiresome. However, two-thirds of my clients have found someone special through online dating. Current esearch says that one in five marriages come from online dating (Recently I've estimated one out of three). So my suggestion is to re-think your strategy. Pick a new site or revamp your profile on a site you have tried before. September is a great time to go back online: you are in a different place in your life and your results may not only be different, but better. I recommend you make time for this endeavor.
2. Join Two To Three New Groups
After the summer break, men and women will be feeling the urge to settle down and looking for love again. Why not join two or three new groups or clubs — pick a group that you're interested in, but haven't yet tried. You'll meet people with things in common, but who aren't the "same old" crew. You'll see I didn't say join 10 groups! I feel it is better to see the same people time and time again so they get to know you. Try to avoid making snap judgments about your fellow group members. If you're having trouble finding an organization, Meetup.com is where it's at. Surf the single Meetups in your area and try a couple for several months. Meetup is all about building relationships over time — that's why it's such a good option.
3. Ask To Be Introduced To Someone New
This is one of the top ways to find someone special — through other people! The best thing you can do is create what I call the 30 second info-mercial. This comprises the essence of who you are and who you're looking for: you want to highlight things that align with your core relationship values, your life goals and your must-haves. You may have to first tell your network that you are looking to meet someone special (perhaps they have assumed you gave up by now!), as well as some details about who you are looking for. You may be surprised that they do indeed know someone to introduce you to.
So if your goal is to find someone special for a serious relationship by the winter holidays, then I strongly suggest that you put some energy and focus on this endeavor and create a targeted dating plan. Like anything in life, that which gets our attention has the best chance of moving forward with the desired results.
More dating coach advice from YourTango:
- How I Became An Online Dating Coach
- 8 Modern Dating Rules Every Single Should Know
- Dating After Divorce? 3 Pitfalls To Avoid