ProConnect

Getting Down To Busyness

By

Getting Down To Busyness
Get off the go go go treadmill to rediscover yourself and deepen in your relationships.

Losing touch with ourselves and our close relationships is a big problem. It reminds me of the Rwandan proverb: “You can out-distance that which is running after you, but not what is running inside you.” Eventually there comes a time when we can’t ignore what is inside of us any longer. In our culture, because we ignore it for so long, it builds like a volcano and comes out in the form of a crisis – in our relationships, jobs, or mental health (depression or anxiety anyone?). But the problem with this is we are then doing crisis work rather than health and growth work. We have less of our resources available to healing and being able to really change because we are too busy trying to put out the fire.

By staying in busyness all the time, we are really being lazy and neglectful in tending to our humanness and it causes problems in our personal lives. It causes disconnect within ourselves and in our close relationships. Further, it decreases our availability to each other and decreases the quality of our work when our focus is on just getting things done rather than getting things done well and learning from the experience.

So how do we change this? Well, it requires a shift in values and change in our expectations. Is our priority our humanness or our business? There is the cliché, "No one on their deathbed ever said, 'I wish I spent more time at work,'” so I know where we say our values are, but we don’t actually do it. We need to slow down and give ourselves permission to not get as much done in this moment. We need to re-prioritize and put our relationships with ourselves and the people in our life first.

Ironically, as I write this my 2 year old daughter climbs on my lap. At first, it was easy for me to set the computer aside and play with her. I’d let her climb on me, flip her upside down, give her some tickles, we laugh and I put her down and pick the computer back up and keep writing. Then she climbs up again, we repeat. After the 3rd time I realized I was starting to get a little annoyed, because I just wanted to get this article finished! I had momentum! Luckily, I am writing about this exact thing at the moment, so I was able to close the computer and play with her until she was done playing. We laugh together, I laugh at myself, I learn. It is a constant practice.

This article was originally published at . Reprinted with permission from the author.

Share this with someone you love (or even like a lot)!

Let's make it
FB official
Recent Expert Posts
Distant Woman

Tips For Getting Back in the Saddle After a Breakup

Recently suffered a breakup? Keep these things in mind and you'll be on your way to healing.

Couple Cooking Healthy Dinner

Your RD’s Top 25 Things To Do/ Not To Do to Be Healthy

Your RD’s Top 25 Things To Do/ Not To Do to Be Healthy

Distant Woman

Is Resentment Ruining Your Marriage?

Practicing forgiveness signifies breaking the cycle of pain and not allowing wounds to fester.

Ask The Experts

Have a dating or relationship question?
Visit Ask YourTango and let our experts and community answer.

Resources
How to find the right pro for you
10 Reasons Mental Health Pros Should Join YourTango Experts

10 Reasons Mental Health Pros Should Join YourTango Experts

YourTango Experts can help your business go from good to great.

10 Steps To Improve Your Coaching Business

Take your coaching business from mediocre to great in no time…

Frequently Asked Questions About YourTango Experts

Thinking of joining? Here's all the facts you need to know to make the most of your membership.

Getting Your Guy To Join You In A Therapy Or Coaching Session

So how can your get your strong, self-reliant, superman to talk to an Expert with you?

Therapist/Counselors: Who We Are & What We Do

What exactly does a therapist/counselor do and can they really help?

See more resources>
HOT STUFF!
FROM OUR PARTNERS