You don't deserve to be loved. / If this doesn't work out, you'll be alone forever! / You're never going to find the one, so you better just settle for him.
Do you recognize that voice? It's the voice of your inner mean girl. She's negative; she's catty; she's judgmental. She compares your worst to everyone else's best. In her eyes, you lose every time. Your inner mean girl's favorite thing to do is to make you feel small, inadequate, and unworthy. Here's how she does it:
Sometimes she is straightforward, and proclaims that you just aren't good enough for the person you are dating, marrying, or living with.
Sometimes she is sneaky, and tells you that you are too good for that person. How To Talk To Men
She can convince you to settle for less than you know in your heart and soul you truly deserve.
When none of those evil tactics work, she relies on her true weapon: filling your head with all kinds of big fat lies that make you doubt what you know to be true about yourself, like that you are a kind, loving, imperfect person who just really wants a great partner to share your life with. And frankly, you deserve it! We all do.
The truth is that if you want to find and keep great love in your life, you have to stop letting your inner mean girl run your show. She is guaranteed disaster for your love life! Are You a Good Listener?
If you are ...
- single, she'll destroy your chances at finding love.
- starting a new relationship, she'll create all kinds of situations that keep you from having the fabulous partnership you want. Guaranteed, she'll sabotage it.
- in a toxic relationship, she'll make you over-stay, trying to convince you that you should just make it work.
While transforming your inner mean girl takes time and skill, there are a few steps you can take right away to take the power back from her self-sabotaging clutches!
1. Let your inner mean girl voice her biggest fears and big fat lies. Fear is the number one food for inner mean girls. They thrive on it. But, when you take your inner mean girl out of the closet by giving voice to the fear, she relaxes, loses all power over you and you can finally find the truth. So go on an inner mean girl and let the fear and big fat lies fly free — "I am so not lovable! I am so afraid I'll be alone forever! I am scared of getting hurt again!” Say them all out loud until they are good and out of your system.