To be able to accept, you need to embrace the pain and acknowledge its existence. Contemplate on the things that have happened and concentrate on what you want to happen in your relationship. Think of the future and see how bright it is. The hurt may not go away instantly, but gradually it will lessen day after day. Time is a great healer as they say and is so true if it is what you want and are willing to focus on that.
Face the Cause of Pain
So who gave you such feelings of hurt? It was your partner wasn't it? Even if you have given him or her a second chance you may still have that feeling of anger towards your partner. Anger because of what he or she did. And while your partner is there, you will constantly be reminded again and again of what happened which would trigger again those painful feelings.
What you need to do is to communicate with your partner and truthfully tell him or her that you are in pain. Tell your partner all the things that you are feeling, pain, anger, grief and tell him or her everything. And be willing to ask for his or help through this painful time. Ask your partner to help you remove all your negative thoughts and feelings. After infidelity if your partner really wants to rebuild your relationship and is truly sorry for what happened they will do everything in his or her power to aid you through this period.