Why He Won't Say "I Love You."


Why He Won't Say "I Love You."
You spend every possible moment basking in each others' company, so why won’t he say I love you?

In Jennifer’s case she discovered that while her man was comfortable being monogamous, committed and loving, he associated saying I love you with taking the relationship to an even greater level. He’d been married before, and wanted to marry again. Further exploration revealed that he wanted to say I love you when he felt confident about the long term future of the relationship. Although their two months had been wonderful, he associated more than meaningful times with saying I love you.

3. He’s Just Not Feelin’ It
Just as you can love someone without being in love; fabulous times, passionate kisses and intimate love making do not necessarily = love or being in love. It’s easy to assume that the man who bears his soul to you on a regular basis without wanting anyone else must be in love with you. However as crazy as it sounds, it’s possible for a man to share virtually every aspect of his life with you without being in love with you. Sometimes as much as he cares about you, he just not in love with you. While the truth may hurt, it’s important to discern whether he’s closed off to loving you or simply a late bloomer in the falling in love department.

So what should you do if your man won’t say I love you?

More from YourTango: What 'RHOA' Star Porsha Stewart's Divorce Can Teach Us

First remember that men and women experience and define love in all different ways, therefore it’s critical for you to refrain from making assumptions when he refrains from saying I love you. Second, make it a point to learn what your man associates with saying I love you along with what he believes will be expected of him. Then you’ll have a better understanding of what saying those words mean to him. Third, check in with yourself and be sure that you aren’t placing greater emphasis on words than what you’re actually experiencing in your relationship. While it’s easy to harp on why he won’t say I love you, it’s equally important to understand why you’re placing so much value on him doing so.

More from YourTango: 3 Questions To Ask Before Dating An Ex-Con

What’s most important in love matters is that your individual desires and intentions are aligned with each other so you’re clear that you want the same outcome. Then you can be in it fully and create a relationship that reflects what you wish to experience today as well as tomorrow. If you need more tips on attracting a relationship with power, pick up a copy of Thank Goodness You Dumped His Ass—Use Those Mr. Wrongs to Lead You Straight to Mr. Right today —and Cheers to your best relationship ever!

Share this with someone you love (or even like a lot)!

Let's make it
FB official
Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Charly Emery


Author of "Thank Goodness You Dumped His Ass" and "How to Date When You’re Famous," Charly Emery's exceptional insight and entertaining style has attracted personal appearances on Fox networks, NBC, countless radio shows and E! network.

Connect with Charly through her FREE CharlySense Digest Newsletter!

Location: Calabasas, CA
Credentials: Other
Other Articles/News by Charly Emery:

8 Simple Tips to Make Valentine's Day Even Better


Making Valentine's day a proof test can ruin an otherwise wonderful relationship. Have you ever wondered why so many men cringe at the mere mention of Valentine's Day? In truth, the men you love want to enjoy expressing their love just as much as you do. The problem is that all too often the societal and commercial pressure of Valentine's Day ... Read more

Mom Trying To Sabotage Your Relationship? 3 Steps To Take


Finding a fabulous romantic partner can be tough enough without your mom sabotaging your chances for lasting love after you may have found it. No matter how understanding and patient your increasingly significant other is, there are still limits. We're seeing this damaging dynamic play out right before our eyes on Real Housewives of Atlanta as the romance ... Read more

What 'RHOA' Star Porsha Stewart's Divorce Can Teach Us


Sure we could chalk up the Stewart's impending divorce as another casualty of the reality show curse, but in truth their short lived marriage provides something powerful we can all learn from. Whether you appear on a reality show or not, when it comes to creating a successful marriage you must design and define your relationship, which is something Kordell ... Read more

See More

Recent Expert Posts
Staying Dry

10 Signs Your Guy is Smitten

Does that new hunky guy you've been dating see you in his future? Here are 10 ways he'll show you.

Girl Decorates Easter Eggs

Rebirth Renew Happy Easter!

Five ways to get going on your best life today!

Texting Your Way To Love

How To Have Cyber Sex: 5 Keys To Unlock Your Lady's Passion

Cyber sex partners disappearing right when things are heating up? Make them crave you instead!

Ask The Experts

Have a dating or relationship question?
Visit Ask YourTango and let our experts and community answer.

How to find the right pro for you
10 Reasons Mental Health Pros Should Join YourTango Experts

10 Reasons Mental Health Pros Should Join YourTango Experts

YourTango Experts can help your business go from good to great.

10 Steps To Improve Your Coaching Business

Take your coaching business from mediocre to great in no time…

Frequently Asked Questions About YourTango Experts

Thinking of joining? Here's all the facts you need to know to make the most of your membership.

Getting Your Guy To Join You In A Therapy Or Coaching Session

So how can your get your strong, self-reliant, superman to talk to an Expert with you?

Therapist/Counselors: Who We Are & What We Do

What exactly does a therapist/counselor do and can they really help?

See more resources>