6. Remember: blaming yourself and others is what keeps the negative feelings going. A feeling only lasts 90 seconds in reality. The feeling stays around because of the thoughts that we attach to the feeling state. This is your story. You can change your story any time you want. However, if you think there is benefit in keeping the story even though it brings pain, disappointment, and heartache, then the story will stay. Remember your story serves a purpose even if the purpose is negative.
7. If you don't know what you feel, blame yourself for some transgression, or think others are the cause of your misery, there can be no compassion. Compassion says I know what I feel and I'm not buying into the negative beliefs that accompany my downer feelings. Remember a feeling is just a feeling. We make it more because of our beliefs.
If you find you are critical of others then that same voice is operating on you. This is a good place to begin, by acknowledging this critical voice and deciding to practice compassion.